Here's a brief year-end retrospective for my 2006.
January: Welcomed the new year with S, N, J, N, and others in B-Town; Took my first law school exams; Decided not to look at my grades along with ABS; Went to Israel and fell in love with it; Began second semester older and wiser; Applied for summer jobs in a panic after realizing that I still had none.
February: Went on a few interviews for summer jobs and decided to stay in N-Town for the summer; Hated contracts, and tax, and didn't like property very much either.
March: Worked on moot court brief; Struggled in tax; Skipped contracts; Visited Austin, Texas with then-Boyfriend and lived with his brother and niece; Battled allergies.
April: Competed in negotiations competition with ABS; Crammed as much tax as possible into my head before final exams; Chose courses for next year; Was contemplative and thoughtful about future directions, etc.
May: Studied like crazy; Took second set of law school exams, including contracts on no sleep; Enjoyed one day of leisure by watching the X-Men movies with ABS; Had a Week from Hell and the Worst Day of My Life with the Law Review competition; Drove to N-Town; Recovered.
June: Began new life as fighter for justice; aka summer intern at prosecutor's office; Loved everything; Realized that law school taught me very few practical skills; Watched a ton of trials; Hung out with Boyfriend and visited wineries, watched movies, etc.; Made my appearance in court; Celebrated 26th birthday; Hung out with parents and picked strawberries; Continued not looking at my grades.
July: Went to Vermont with Boyfriend over 4th of July weekend; Got better at my summer job; Got closer to my co-interns; Helped in a trial which unfortunately ended with hung jury; Did not make Law Review; Was disappointed; Got over it.
August: Ended my summer job with a lot of wistfulness; Traveled to Gen Con and hung out with ABS and friends, with some unexpected but sweet victories; Traveled to Scandinavia and visited Sweden, Norway, Denmark, and Finland; Went on a cruise for the first time; Ate too much herring; Saw fjords; Missed Germany.
September: Returned to C-Town; Began new semester; Decided to take 5 courses; began RAing; Started bidding for firms for OCI, and started interviewing while classes were going on; Suffered from chronic sleep deprivation;
October: Interviewing reached crescendo; Chose my callbacks; RAed for Prof. M like crazy; Became very familiar with the late-night bus drivers; Went on exactly 3 callback interviews, and got 3 offers, before cancelling the 5 interviews for the rest of the flyout week; Broke up with Boyfriend; Was depresse and scared; Got (partially) over it.
November: Relationship drama; Career and life angst; Ridiculous sleep deprivation; More drama; More angst. More sleep deprivation. Ay, November was a crazy month, but at least I got to have dinner with Justice Scalia.
December: After much agonizing, decided to go with NY firm rather than DC firm; Fell in love; Final exams again, this time with much less preparaton; Battled with evil comparative con law exam, with outcome unclear; Had severe sleep problems; Got new beautiful black MacBook; Bought untold amount of J Crew clothes; Went to Puerto Rico on a whim; Tanned myself; Hung out with parents; Retrieved my stuff from ex-Boyfriend on the second to last day of the year; Pleased about the clean break.
Yes, my life is certainly not simple these days, but after all this, and perhaps because of all this, I'm still intact, hopeful, idealistic, and reasonably happy. I am happy I came to law school. I am glad I made the decisions I did. I think I can do what I want to do with my life, with a littel bit of focus and effort. And I'm keeping my fingers crossed, but my heart open, about those things I cannot control or change.
This is something.
Dear readers, thank you for sharing the past year with me. I hope that you will have, -- that we will all have, -- an amazing, fantastic, lovely, and wonderful New Year. See you in 2007.
12/31/2006
12/28/2006
Home Sweet Home
After four days in the glorious sun, turqoise sea, white sandy beaches, and 80+ degrees weather, I'm back home in B-town, tanner, fatter (because of all the rice, beans, and plantains), and sadly, with a headcold made worse by the airplane ride. Was that Puerto Rico's parting gift to me? No amount of Airbourne was going to keep THIS baby of a cold away!
So, I'm exhausted, both from the cold and from the traveling. So I will share my stories of PR later. In the meanwhile, I should take a shower, and fall into blissful sleep, and dream about the Caribbeans.
So, I'm exhausted, both from the cold and from the traveling. So I will share my stories of PR later. In the meanwhile, I should take a shower, and fall into blissful sleep, and dream about the Caribbeans.
12/25/2006
Puerto Rico
Well, I'm here. Puerto Rico so far has been lovely... and dark. I didn't really sleep last night, and went to the airport at 6:00 am. The Jetblue flight was very smooth, and I slept much of the time. I arrived shortly before 1 in the afternoon in the San Juan International Airport. Then passed out like a light in the hotel and didn't wake up until almost 6 and dark outside.
I got up and began wandering around. My hotel was located in a very touristy part of town filled with resorts, parks, bars, and stores. Right around the corner of my hotel there were ritzy and upscale boutique shops as well as national chains -- Puerto Rico has no sales tax and I guess that's a big draw for some of the tourists.
There is a beach nearby and I took a walk there in the dark, listened to the waves, and called my parents. There were also no fewer than three Starbucks within walking distance. TOTALLY my kind of neighborhood if you ask me. :) They have dfferent pastries here -- look creamier and richer. I bet they are tastier.
Had dinner at Pizzeria Uno (I know, I know. I was tired and didn't feel like anything adventurous tonight), With a nice glass of cab. Then slowly strolled home. I feel slightly sick - have a sore throat and stuffy nose. Perhaps my several weeks of sleep deprivation have finally caught up with me.
I got up and began wandering around. My hotel was located in a very touristy part of town filled with resorts, parks, bars, and stores. Right around the corner of my hotel there were ritzy and upscale boutique shops as well as national chains -- Puerto Rico has no sales tax and I guess that's a big draw for some of the tourists.
There is a beach nearby and I took a walk there in the dark, listened to the waves, and called my parents. There were also no fewer than three Starbucks within walking distance. TOTALLY my kind of neighborhood if you ask me. :) They have dfferent pastries here -- look creamier and richer. I bet they are tastier.
Had dinner at Pizzeria Uno (I know, I know. I was tired and didn't feel like anything adventurous tonight), With a nice glass of cab. Then slowly strolled home. I feel slightly sick - have a sore throat and stuffy nose. Perhaps my several weeks of sleep deprivation have finally caught up with me.
Merry Christmas
I'm packing to go to Puerto Rico. The flight leaves in 7 hours. I leave my apartment in 5 hours.
The trip was quite impulsive. Last week, in the depth of finals hell, I wished that I was somewhere sunnier, warmer, with long stretches of beaches upon which I could sit and get tan and do nothing other than read novels that have nothing to do with law. In the midst of all the fantasizing, I looked at Jetblue's website, and saw an amazing fare for a direct flight from B-Town to San Juan. And uncharacteristically, I just decided to go ahead and get the ticket, thinking that if I changed my mind, I could always just not go and get credits for my next flight (and Jetblue being my favorite airline I was sure there would be a next flight).
And now I'm really going! I got a Lets Go guide to Puerto Rico today, and a memoir by Esmeralda Santiago ("When I was Puerto Rican" - love that title) that I plan to read there. I'm bringing a bunch of non-law-related novels, in fact. I am so looking forward to reading on the beach!
Just checked the weather, and San Juan is, at the moment, 75 degrees. :D:D:D
Well, so here's where _I_'ll be spending my next few days. Whereever YOU are, dear readers, merry Christmas and happy holidays to you!
The trip was quite impulsive. Last week, in the depth of finals hell, I wished that I was somewhere sunnier, warmer, with long stretches of beaches upon which I could sit and get tan and do nothing other than read novels that have nothing to do with law. In the midst of all the fantasizing, I looked at Jetblue's website, and saw an amazing fare for a direct flight from B-Town to San Juan. And uncharacteristically, I just decided to go ahead and get the ticket, thinking that if I changed my mind, I could always just not go and get credits for my next flight (and Jetblue being my favorite airline I was sure there would be a next flight).
And now I'm really going! I got a Lets Go guide to Puerto Rico today, and a memoir by Esmeralda Santiago ("When I was Puerto Rican" - love that title) that I plan to read there. I'm bringing a bunch of non-law-related novels, in fact. I am so looking forward to reading on the beach!
Just checked the weather, and San Juan is, at the moment, 75 degrees. :D:D:D
Well, so here's where _I_'ll be spending my next few days. Whereever YOU are, dear readers, merry Christmas and happy holidays to you!
12/21/2006
Happy
It's amazing to wake up knowing that you don't have 10-12 hours of work ahead of you, that your whole day is YOURS, that you can choose to do whatever you want, or nothing at all.
Came back to the apartment this morning at 4:30 am, slept untll noon. Had lunch with ABS at our favorite pizza place, then wandered around in the Square; bought a whole bunch of stuff for me and my loved ones at my favorite skin care store, and 2 pairs of jeans at my favorite jean store (not really, I should say the only jeans store within walking distance from my apartment). Then came home, saw J, who handed her dog to me to care for for 3 days.
Moped around a bit in the evening, then went out and had Japanese food, while reading (gasp!) a NON-LAW-RELATED BOOK! In case you're interested, the book is Zadie's Smith's On Beauty. It's a novel set in "fictional college of Wellington" in a small academic town near Boston. Hee hee. Already it's very entertaining. Then came home, moped around some more, and around 10:30 took the dog outside for an one-hour walk all around C-Town. Just came home. The dog is asleep on my floor. I'm surfing the Internet aimlessly.
I'm loving life right now. Of course, there is still mountain of laundary and dishes to do, and piles of clothes to organize (and I do plan to donate a lot of them this year.) But for now, I'm determined to do nothing. Perhaps I'll even go to bed before midnight!
Came back to the apartment this morning at 4:30 am, slept untll noon. Had lunch with ABS at our favorite pizza place, then wandered around in the Square; bought a whole bunch of stuff for me and my loved ones at my favorite skin care store, and 2 pairs of jeans at my favorite jean store (not really, I should say the only jeans store within walking distance from my apartment). Then came home, saw J, who handed her dog to me to care for for 3 days.
Moped around a bit in the evening, then went out and had Japanese food, while reading (gasp!) a NON-LAW-RELATED BOOK! In case you're interested, the book is Zadie's Smith's On Beauty. It's a novel set in "fictional college of Wellington" in a small academic town near Boston. Hee hee. Already it's very entertaining. Then came home, moped around some more, and around 10:30 took the dog outside for an one-hour walk all around C-Town. Just came home. The dog is asleep on my floor. I'm surfing the Internet aimlessly.
I'm loving life right now. Of course, there is still mountain of laundary and dishes to do, and piles of clothes to organize (and I do plan to donate a lot of them this year.) But for now, I'm determined to do nothing. Perhaps I'll even go to bed before midnight!
12/20/2006
Done with Half of Law School!
Wow, this is a scary thought... I feel like I hardly know any law!
Con law final was... really hard, but interesting. I broke my rule of never talking about the exam today with ABS. I missed some, got other stuff. Feel okay about it.
The past two weeks were intense, difficult, frustrating, exhausting, crazy, lonely, hysterical, anxious, and really really long. BUt it's finally over! And I'm still alive! That's quite a feat in itself, trust me...
Con law final was... really hard, but interesting. I broke my rule of never talking about the exam today with ABS. I missed some, got other stuff. Feel okay about it.
The past two weeks were intense, difficult, frustrating, exhausting, crazy, lonely, hysterical, anxious, and really really long. BUt it's finally over! And I'm still alive! That's quite a feat in itself, trust me...
12/19/2006
Almost There...
Two more days of this hell, and then I will be done with the fall semester!
For now, I have to furiously outline the section on Equal Protection and gender discrmination!
(Sleep count in the past 24 hours: 1.5 hours. Yeah baby!)
For now, I have to furiously outline the section on Equal Protection and gender discrmination!
(Sleep count in the past 24 hours: 1.5 hours. Yeah baby!)
12/17/2006
A Poem that I Liked, While Not Writing My Exam
BUS STOP
Donald Justice
Lights are burning
In quiet rooms
Where lives go on
Resembling ours.
The quiet lives
That follow us-
These lives we lead
But do not own-
Stand in the rain
So quietly
When we are gone,
So quietly…
And the last bus
Comes letting dark
Umbrellas out-
Black flowers, black flowers.
And lives go on.
And lives go on
Like sudden lights
At street corners
Or like the lights
In quiet rooms
Left on for hours,
Burning, burning.
Donald Justice
Lights are burning
In quiet rooms
Where lives go on
Resembling ours.
The quiet lives
That follow us-
These lives we lead
But do not own-
Stand in the rain
So quietly
When we are gone,
So quietly…
And the last bus
Comes letting dark
Umbrellas out-
Black flowers, black flowers.
And lives go on.
And lives go on
Like sudden lights
At street corners
Or like the lights
In quiet rooms
Left on for hours,
Burning, burning.
12/14/2006
Recipe for Uplifted Moods
- Work, 3 hours (with some chatting sessions with friends thrown in between, but not overly long)
- Gym, 1.5 hours (running 2.5 miles, doing ellipticls for 25 minutes, rowing for 5 minutes, lots of situps, sweat a lot. Felt good.)
- Talk on phone with parents, 30 minutes.
- Getting fresh veggies from the local supermarket and making a salad with all the ingredients while on phone with parents, 30 minutes.
(Salad contains: mixed greens, tomatoes, sliced cucumbers, sliced broccoli, avocado, roasted pepper, sliced radishes, dried cranberries, pine nuts, sliced eggs, and a table spoon of fat-free soy vinaigrette dressing from Trader Joe's (my favorite!)).
- Enjoying said salad while chatting with S and ABS online, 30 minutes.
And I am a very happy gal. :)
Okay, time to do some con law, then an early night of sleep for me (hopefully. I take nothing for granted these days, and can imagine my body staying up for 48 hours straight. Ugh.)
- Gym, 1.5 hours (running 2.5 miles, doing ellipticls for 25 minutes, rowing for 5 minutes, lots of situps, sweat a lot. Felt good.)
- Talk on phone with parents, 30 minutes.
- Getting fresh veggies from the local supermarket and making a salad with all the ingredients while on phone with parents, 30 minutes.
(Salad contains: mixed greens, tomatoes, sliced cucumbers, sliced broccoli, avocado, roasted pepper, sliced radishes, dried cranberries, pine nuts, sliced eggs, and a table spoon of fat-free soy vinaigrette dressing from Trader Joe's (my favorite!)).
- Enjoying said salad while chatting with S and ABS online, 30 minutes.
And I am a very happy gal. :)
Okay, time to do some con law, then an early night of sleep for me (hopefully. I take nothing for granted these days, and can imagine my body staying up for 48 hours straight. Ugh.)
Massive Insomnia!
Wow, this is certainly a first. After taking my new sleep medication, which worked wonderfully last night, I lay in bed for 1.5 hours without being able to go to sleep. Thoughts just turned round and round in my head, but no sleep came. I then got up, surfed the Internet like a zombie for 2 hours or so, and then tried again circa 4:30. I even used two of those cucumber eye pads to cool down my eyes and make myself feel more relaxed.
After about 40 more minutes of lying awake, I decided to give up again, and got up and began trying to write more of my comparative con law exam.
I am going to go to Starbucks in a few minutes, to get a morning cup of tea and to work some more. Right now, I feel a bit like that tragic Greek character who can never die and instead just wastes away. Do you know what I'm talking about? What is his name? Anyway, this is kind of ridiculous. Why is sleep always such a big deal with me?!? Argh.
After about 40 more minutes of lying awake, I decided to give up again, and got up and began trying to write more of my comparative con law exam.
I am going to go to Starbucks in a few minutes, to get a morning cup of tea and to work some more. Right now, I feel a bit like that tragic Greek character who can never die and instead just wastes away. Do you know what I'm talking about? What is his name? Anyway, this is kind of ridiculous. Why is sleep always such a big deal with me?!? Argh.
12/12/2006
And in other procrastinatory news...
I love this coat! Need it! Sadly, some colors and sizes are already sold out.
Here's another look. Notice the crisp, slimming, nicely A-lined shape.
Here's another look. Notice the crisp, slimming, nicely A-lined shape.
12/11/2006
New Toy
My new 13" black MacBook arrived today, all prestine and beautiful. This is not good for my exams, since I spent the better part of today playing with it. The built iSight is amazing. Guess who spent several hours turning that on and staring at the image on the computer screen? :)
Comparative con law is going slowly. I should probably go back to it though. Sigh...
Comparative con law is going slowly. I should probably go back to it though. Sigh...
Extra! Extra!
I just called and accepted a summer position at the ritzy NYC firm. Feels good to have finally made a decision. Now I can look forward to a summer of high rents and slaving away, but all for a good resume item and the avoidance of that dark spectre called "regret."
12/10/2006
WorkWorkWork
Worked all day today, but first went to the gym for 1.5 hours, stretched, ran, rowed, did situps, and worked the ellipiticals. It felt good though also exhausting.
Then went to Starbucks where I sat for nearly the entire afternoon reading comparative con law. So many of my classmates were here, carrying huge red, blue, or brown books. I staked out one of the large computer tables and just spread my books and papers around. I probably looked much more diligent than I in fact was...
In the evening, went to CVS to pick up my new sleep medication. Then had sushi at the usual college haunt that ABS and I sometimes go to. It was disappointing, actually. The salmon sashimi pieces were incredibly small and not very fresh, so my cravings didn't get satisfied. Perhaps I will go to that other sushi place tomorrow, if I get enough work done and want to take a break...
So, better work some more now.
Then went to Starbucks where I sat for nearly the entire afternoon reading comparative con law. So many of my classmates were here, carrying huge red, blue, or brown books. I staked out one of the large computer tables and just spread my books and papers around. I probably looked much more diligent than I in fact was...
In the evening, went to CVS to pick up my new sleep medication. Then had sushi at the usual college haunt that ABS and I sometimes go to. It was disappointing, actually. The salmon sashimi pieces were incredibly small and not very fresh, so my cravings didn't get satisfied. Perhaps I will go to that other sushi place tomorrow, if I get enough work done and want to take a break...
So, better work some more now.
12/09/2006
In the Thick of It
It was cold as hell here yesterday. Extremely unpleasant to walk outside. I spent much of the day on campus, working in my favorite spots and reading a lot of con law. I have not started my comparative con law exam yet. I did read the question, but that was about all I did. I should start on that ... TODAY!
Last night I went out, in spite of the bitter cold, with S for sushi. I am addicted to salmon sashimi these days, and literally need to eat it every few days. Needless to say, my bank account is rapidly being depleted, and all my friends kind of look at me with amusement.
S and I had a good conversation, and he said some helpful things about which firm I should choose -- whether I should go to the ritzy NY firm that would work me like a slave but look awfully good on the resume, or this competitive and intellectual firm in DC that has a ridiculously prestigious appellate practice. (And the answer is not what you might think).
Speaking of Salmon, after I got home last night, around 3 am or so, when I was feeling really hungry and strangely craving salmon again, I actually tried last night to order some sushi-grade salmon online. I did find some online sellers, but then discovered that the shipping rate is simply outrageous. I also discovered that there is actually a decent fish market for sushi-grade salmon near my house, so perhaps I will pay them a visit in the next few days (or even today if the craving hits).
In other news, on Thursday I went to the health clinic for my sleep problem. The doctor (not sure she's a doctor, actually. Could be just a nurse?) prescribed some new sleep medication, so I will be off ambien and hopefully off the weird blackouts and bizarre behavior. The clinician and I also just talked about my life in general. I have a theory that my sleep problem is anxiety related, and the clinician appeared to agree with me, and recommended either anti-anxiety medication or some therapy. I told her I would have to think about these options. She agreed that my life appears to be under control and going well, so neither option was really required, but she nonetheless thought it may be helpful.
It's kind of ironic also because I think this period in my life is the happiest I have had in years. I am nearly always in an okay, if not upbeat, mood. I like my work. I enjoy school. I love my friends. It's true that there are potentials for instability, but I don't think that can ever be eliminated from my life. On the other hand, my anxiety (mostly about work, I think, but also about life choices and relationship issues) does seem to manifest itself mostly in my sleep patterns. Sleep has never been easy for me. Even in the best of times, it required planning. In stressful times, it's a major obstacble to me enjoying life.
So perhaps I should deal with it. On the other hand, who has the time to go to therapy? And I have always been extremely uncomfortable with the idea of artificially changing my brain chemistry. It makes me feel so... inauthetic. SF was on anti-anxiety medication for a while, and when I asked him about it, he told me that the drug made him relaxed but detached, and it was hard for him to feel love. That sounds awful to me. I want to feel love, even at the risk of being anxious, insecure, or miserable. (Not that love is only those things, or even mostly those things. Okay I should shut up now before I say things that are even stupider.)
I am now sitting in the dining hall, wearing my elf-hat that I got in Finland, reading con law, drinking a cup of Earl Grey, and staring at two lemon bars that I am resolved not to eat. Yay for self control.
Last night I went out, in spite of the bitter cold, with S for sushi. I am addicted to salmon sashimi these days, and literally need to eat it every few days. Needless to say, my bank account is rapidly being depleted, and all my friends kind of look at me with amusement.
S and I had a good conversation, and he said some helpful things about which firm I should choose -- whether I should go to the ritzy NY firm that would work me like a slave but look awfully good on the resume, or this competitive and intellectual firm in DC that has a ridiculously prestigious appellate practice. (And the answer is not what you might think).
Speaking of Salmon, after I got home last night, around 3 am or so, when I was feeling really hungry and strangely craving salmon again, I actually tried last night to order some sushi-grade salmon online. I did find some online sellers, but then discovered that the shipping rate is simply outrageous. I also discovered that there is actually a decent fish market for sushi-grade salmon near my house, so perhaps I will pay them a visit in the next few days (or even today if the craving hits).
In other news, on Thursday I went to the health clinic for my sleep problem. The doctor (not sure she's a doctor, actually. Could be just a nurse?) prescribed some new sleep medication, so I will be off ambien and hopefully off the weird blackouts and bizarre behavior. The clinician and I also just talked about my life in general. I have a theory that my sleep problem is anxiety related, and the clinician appeared to agree with me, and recommended either anti-anxiety medication or some therapy. I told her I would have to think about these options. She agreed that my life appears to be under control and going well, so neither option was really required, but she nonetheless thought it may be helpful.
It's kind of ironic also because I think this period in my life is the happiest I have had in years. I am nearly always in an okay, if not upbeat, mood. I like my work. I enjoy school. I love my friends. It's true that there are potentials for instability, but I don't think that can ever be eliminated from my life. On the other hand, my anxiety (mostly about work, I think, but also about life choices and relationship issues) does seem to manifest itself mostly in my sleep patterns. Sleep has never been easy for me. Even in the best of times, it required planning. In stressful times, it's a major obstacble to me enjoying life.
So perhaps I should deal with it. On the other hand, who has the time to go to therapy? And I have always been extremely uncomfortable with the idea of artificially changing my brain chemistry. It makes me feel so... inauthetic. SF was on anti-anxiety medication for a while, and when I asked him about it, he told me that the drug made him relaxed but detached, and it was hard for him to feel love. That sounds awful to me. I want to feel love, even at the risk of being anxious, insecure, or miserable. (Not that love is only those things, or even mostly those things. Okay I should shut up now before I say things that are even stupider.)
I am now sitting in the dining hall, wearing my elf-hat that I got in Finland, reading con law, drinking a cup of Earl Grey, and staring at two lemon bars that I am resolved not to eat. Yay for self control.
12/05/2006
Battered
Okay, this not-having-a-battery thing is getting old. I can't tell you how many times in the past few days when my cord has been yanked out of my computer and it dies and I lose everything that I have been working on up til then. So annoying. Apple, please send me my battery fast!
Got our comparative con law exam today! Woohoo. The next two weeks will be fun...
Got our comparative con law exam today! Woohoo. The next two weeks will be fun...
12/04/2006
Tired
I'm exhausted and stressed out. Littel white bumps have shown up on my face in clusters. Friend Dickie told that it's due to stress. I hope they go away soon.
I spent the past 2 days basically writing a reaction paper to a terrible, terrible paper that is being workshopped for our Law and Economy workshop. The reaction paper itself is not going to matter, and I don't know why I became so obsessed with it. As a result, I haven't done any con law or comparative con law reading, and I have also slept way too little in the past few days. Argh!
Okay, better go back to finishing my paper now. Sigh...
I spent the past 2 days basically writing a reaction paper to a terrible, terrible paper that is being workshopped for our Law and Economy workshop. The reaction paper itself is not going to matter, and I don't know why I became so obsessed with it. As a result, I haven't done any con law or comparative con law reading, and I have also slept way too little in the past few days. Argh!
Okay, better go back to finishing my paper now. Sigh...
12/03/2006
Beginning of the Exam Season, Again
Not much to say except that I'm beginning to feel a bit stressed. Also a little depressed and sad tonight. Hung out with AG, had a nice dinner, and came back trying to do my reaction paper for the political economy workshop. Instead read my old diaries from 2 years ago and remembered some very unhappy times that I was experiencing.
Needless to say, this did nothing to lift me out of my depressive state.
Contemplating drinking sake. Will that lift me out of my depressive state? Probably not. Hmmm...
Needless to say, this did nothing to lift me out of my depressive state.
Contemplating drinking sake. Will that lift me out of my depressive state? Probably not. Hmmm...
12/02/2006
Nice Day
In spite of the rain, I had a very good day today. It was as warm as yesterday. I slept until 11, had a nice lunch with ABS at the residential college that we are tutors at, then took the bus to the mall on the other side of town where we shopped for a full 3 hours. I bought a ton of stuff. ABS... didn't, but still seemed to have a good time. We checked out the Nintendo Wii and shopped for a hat for him and bought lots of knee-high socks for me. I'm a little obsessed with knee-high socks at the moment. Wear them with boots and they look so innocently sexy.
ANYWAY. Came back and had dinner with a friend. Lots of good food, conversation, and good company tonight. Came back in a very good mood.
Sadly, have to start preparing for final exams this weekend. You can always tell when it's exam time by my sudden interest in reading other, non-exam-related law material, and my sudden diligence about cleaning EVERY SINGLE SPOT in my apartment. I was cleaning 'til 3 am last night, vacuuming and washing dishes and wiping down counters. My apartment is now spotless. Sadly I still don't know any con law. :)
ANYWAY. Came back and had dinner with a friend. Lots of good food, conversation, and good company tonight. Came back in a very good mood.
Sadly, have to start preparing for final exams this weekend. You can always tell when it's exam time by my sudden interest in reading other, non-exam-related law material, and my sudden diligence about cleaning EVERY SINGLE SPOT in my apartment. I was cleaning 'til 3 am last night, vacuuming and washing dishes and wiping down counters. My apartment is now spotless. Sadly I still don't know any con law. :)
12/01/2006
Malfunctioning
My computer is kinda broken. The "kinda" is the key word that makes it possible for me to be still writing this post right now. On Wednesday night, I attended this lecture and then went to a very nice reception afterwards, where there were a lot of pristine-looking bottles of water on the refreshments table. Greed took over and I put two bottles in my bag, unopened. When I got home, I discovered that one of the bottles leaked, and my computer was soaked in the water.
It wouldn't turn on. I panicked, called my mom, then ran to ABS's apartment to see whether he had a hairdryer. He didn't, but we walked to the library where I lay my computer on one of the heaters and prayed for it to dry and work again. I spent that night in suspense.
The next morning, my computer turned on, but the battery was dead, and there was a lot of water stains under the screen, so the whole display looked spotty and very funky. But at least my files were still therer. I backed up the most important ones, whined a lot to my mom, who agreed to mail me a check for $1,200 immediately to get a new computer. Wow! So that was the silver lining in my cloud, and I spent the past two days blissfully salivating over Apple's black Macbooks.
I finally decided on one today - it's black, which is all I care about, with a lot of numbers that I'm sure means it's very fast. :) It's also refurbished, which means that I get to have it for $400 less than one that's new. I bought it over the phone and it should be here in a week. In the meanwhile, my old computer and I will hobble along, enjoying our last days together.
Lots of :Ds these days:
- Being present at a small dinner with a Supreme Court Justice, and talking to him about New Jersey, my law school, and the Socratic Method.
- Having a great and very clarifying conversation with Prof H about the future of my career, next semester, possibly taking a class with him, and learning more about psychology and statistics.
- The gorgeous, (globally-warming-induced, I'm sure) 60-something weather we've had today.
It wouldn't turn on. I panicked, called my mom, then ran to ABS's apartment to see whether he had a hairdryer. He didn't, but we walked to the library where I lay my computer on one of the heaters and prayed for it to dry and work again. I spent that night in suspense.
The next morning, my computer turned on, but the battery was dead, and there was a lot of water stains under the screen, so the whole display looked spotty and very funky. But at least my files were still therer. I backed up the most important ones, whined a lot to my mom, who agreed to mail me a check for $1,200 immediately to get a new computer. Wow! So that was the silver lining in my cloud, and I spent the past two days blissfully salivating over Apple's black Macbooks.
I finally decided on one today - it's black, which is all I care about, with a lot of numbers that I'm sure means it's very fast. :) It's also refurbished, which means that I get to have it for $400 less than one that's new. I bought it over the phone and it should be here in a week. In the meanwhile, my old computer and I will hobble along, enjoying our last days together.
Lots of :Ds these days:
- Being present at a small dinner with a Supreme Court Justice, and talking to him about New Jersey, my law school, and the Socratic Method.
- Having a great and very clarifying conversation with Prof H about the future of my career, next semester, possibly taking a class with him, and learning more about psychology and statistics.
- The gorgeous, (globally-warming-induced, I'm sure) 60-something weather we've had today.
11/28/2006
Updates and New Directions
So I have been doing a lot of thinking over Thanksgiving break (and therefore did not have as much time to complete my actual work, but that's another story. :) ). One thing I have been feeling frustrated about is the fact that I simply know too little about the tools that would enable me to understand law well -- namely, the social sciences.
All of the social sciences, psychology, sociology, economics, antropology, political science... etc., each has so much to say about how people in fact behave, and offer their answers and perspectives on how people, both as individuals and as collectives, act. These answers are paramountly important in a legal context, because after all, law is intended to regulate and change human behavior. I can't believe that so many legal academics talk about what law ought to be, or how legislation and statutes affect behavior, without explicitly specifying what views and assumptions of human nature and human behavior they are talking about.
Moreover, through talking to a new friend, I also realized that I have no idea how to do empirical research, should I ever want to. So many questions in law have actual empirical answers. The whole debate about whether juries should make decisions rather than judges, for example, have actual answers in reality, if we agree that accuracy and efficiency are values that we should maximize (though this is debatable, I agree. Earlier I wrote a short reaction paper arguing that those should not be the only values. :) ). Or whether certain voting law, or statutes limiting freedom of speech, or affirmative action legislaion, or court decisions ordering integration of schools -- do these laws work and do they achieve their intended effects? Often legal academics have no idea, and they just sit there and speculate and argue about theory and doctrines, which I find frustrating.
The point is there are testable hypothesis in law, but apparently very few people are actually doing the research to find out whether these hypotheses are true. I heard that empirical research is time-consuming and boring, and I'd much rather be in la-la theory land. (This is part of my attraction to law and narratives -- so easy and requires no empirical analysis whatsoever!)
On the other hand, if I ever want to know how to use the tools of empirical research, and perhaps I do, now is the time to learn how to do it.
So, over break, I realized that what I should try to do next semester is to cross-register for courses in the School of Arts and Sciences. Perhaps I can audit a few, or take statistics or psychology or some other courses for credit.
My undergraduate years, alas, were spent taking graduate level seminars on super in-depth topics like Hegel's Aesthetics or the Political Economy of the French Revolution. They were really fun, but I got very little overview of entire fields. Now I really wish I had that so that I can connect all these ideas and theories together in a coherent way, and understand how they speak to each other and argue with each other. It's sad to realize, 5 years after one graduates college, that one should have taken more large, freshman-filled intro courses.
Nonetheles, I think this is what I will do next semester. I need to find out how to actually do this and how I can get credit for doing it, but I definitely need to receive some formal training in the social sciences and methods of quantitative analysis.
In other news, my parents are proposing to pay for my plane ticket to go to Switzerland, to visit my aunt who lives on the Swiss-German border, and for me to ski in Zurich if I want. This is tempting. Should I do it?
All of the social sciences, psychology, sociology, economics, antropology, political science... etc., each has so much to say about how people in fact behave, and offer their answers and perspectives on how people, both as individuals and as collectives, act. These answers are paramountly important in a legal context, because after all, law is intended to regulate and change human behavior. I can't believe that so many legal academics talk about what law ought to be, or how legislation and statutes affect behavior, without explicitly specifying what views and assumptions of human nature and human behavior they are talking about.
Moreover, through talking to a new friend, I also realized that I have no idea how to do empirical research, should I ever want to. So many questions in law have actual empirical answers. The whole debate about whether juries should make decisions rather than judges, for example, have actual answers in reality, if we agree that accuracy and efficiency are values that we should maximize (though this is debatable, I agree. Earlier I wrote a short reaction paper arguing that those should not be the only values. :) ). Or whether certain voting law, or statutes limiting freedom of speech, or affirmative action legislaion, or court decisions ordering integration of schools -- do these laws work and do they achieve their intended effects? Often legal academics have no idea, and they just sit there and speculate and argue about theory and doctrines, which I find frustrating.
The point is there are testable hypothesis in law, but apparently very few people are actually doing the research to find out whether these hypotheses are true. I heard that empirical research is time-consuming and boring, and I'd much rather be in la-la theory land. (This is part of my attraction to law and narratives -- so easy and requires no empirical analysis whatsoever!)
On the other hand, if I ever want to know how to use the tools of empirical research, and perhaps I do, now is the time to learn how to do it.
So, over break, I realized that what I should try to do next semester is to cross-register for courses in the School of Arts and Sciences. Perhaps I can audit a few, or take statistics or psychology or some other courses for credit.
My undergraduate years, alas, were spent taking graduate level seminars on super in-depth topics like Hegel's Aesthetics or the Political Economy of the French Revolution. They were really fun, but I got very little overview of entire fields. Now I really wish I had that so that I can connect all these ideas and theories together in a coherent way, and understand how they speak to each other and argue with each other. It's sad to realize, 5 years after one graduates college, that one should have taken more large, freshman-filled intro courses.
Nonetheles, I think this is what I will do next semester. I need to find out how to actually do this and how I can get credit for doing it, but I definitely need to receive some formal training in the social sciences and methods of quantitative analysis.
In other news, my parents are proposing to pay for my plane ticket to go to Switzerland, to visit my aunt who lives on the Swiss-German border, and for me to ski in Zurich if I want. This is tempting. Should I do it?
Poem
This is the first poem I have written in a long time (in high school I used to write quite a lot, as some of you may know. :) ).
This is the first draft. The language is very rough, obviously, but some imageries are interesting.
Poem
When I love you, I am a river
Rushing towards you
And you are mountains in the distance, your rocks and boulders
channeling me into narrower and narrower straits.
Or I am a fire, my tongues flickering, burning
For you, and you are the fireplace, containing me,
turning me into a pile of ash.
I am a shadow, standing at your door, the light
From your window shattering me, tearing me to pieces.
Or I am, I am a country, and you are another, between us
An endless border. Though all my people long to belong to you
You separate us with walls, with guns, with armies and sentries.
Or you are a song, sung in a luminous
voice in a foreign language, with words rich and opaque
And I am American; you are incomprehensible.
Or I am an army, and you are an impregnable city.
Though I surround you with troops, and you are starving.
You’d rather be burned
than capitulate, and shoot at me with poisonous darts.
Or I am sand, and you are water. No matter how small I try
To make myself, to dissolve into you
We are separate and distinct.
When they run us through a filter, you are pure again
And I am left behind.
There is no solution.
Always, dear, always, when I love you,
I am on the outside.
You are on the inside.
This is the first draft. The language is very rough, obviously, but some imageries are interesting.
Poem
When I love you, I am a river
Rushing towards you
And you are mountains in the distance, your rocks and boulders
channeling me into narrower and narrower straits.
Or I am a fire, my tongues flickering, burning
For you, and you are the fireplace, containing me,
turning me into a pile of ash.
I am a shadow, standing at your door, the light
From your window shattering me, tearing me to pieces.
Or I am, I am a country, and you are another, between us
An endless border. Though all my people long to belong to you
You separate us with walls, with guns, with armies and sentries.
Or you are a song, sung in a luminous
voice in a foreign language, with words rich and opaque
And I am American; you are incomprehensible.
Or I am an army, and you are an impregnable city.
Though I surround you with troops, and you are starving.
You’d rather be burned
than capitulate, and shoot at me with poisonous darts.
Or I am sand, and you are water. No matter how small I try
To make myself, to dissolve into you
We are separate and distinct.
When they run us through a filter, you are pure again
And I am left behind.
There is no solution.
Always, dear, always, when I love you,
I am on the outside.
You are on the inside.
11/23/2006
Thanks
I hope you will allow me to wish you all a happy Thanksgiving. I know that I haven't written for a while, and this is entirely due to my own laziness. But in spite of being busy, I realized today that my life is at a very good, happy place right now. I made the right decisions in the past few months, and feel more clarity about the decisions I'm about to make. I am calm and hopeful and healthy. My parents are both healthy and active, and I look forward to spending time with them. I have many good friends and satisfying social relationships. I really like law school and enjoy my work here. Even the stress is a good kind of stress -- focused, goal-oriented, directed.
I'm sure I will be quite frazzled come finals week, but this is a good kind of frazzledness.
In the meanwhile, I'm at my apartment in C-Town, eating my favorite dish (sauteed chicken liver with bell peppers), listening to my favorite Beethoven Piano Concert (the 5th), chatting with friend (SF), reading con law (on affirmative action), and looking forward to perhaps seeing a dear friend this evening.
I hope all of your Thanksgivings are as fun and nice as mine is at this moment.
I'm sure I will be quite frazzled come finals week, but this is a good kind of frazzledness.
In the meanwhile, I'm at my apartment in C-Town, eating my favorite dish (sauteed chicken liver with bell peppers), listening to my favorite Beethoven Piano Concert (the 5th), chatting with friend (SF), reading con law (on affirmative action), and looking forward to perhaps seeing a dear friend this evening.
I hope all of your Thanksgivings are as fun and nice as mine is at this moment.
11/12/2006
Exhausted
I'm still up, at 3:25 am, writing a memo for Professor JH for his next article. Life is not good.
Went to a good concert with ABS in B-Town tonight, which is part of the reason why this memo is still not finished (that, and the fact that I procrastinated a lot today). I am on my 4th cup of white tea, and am very, very, very much looking forward to sleep.
Went to a good concert with ABS in B-Town tonight, which is part of the reason why this memo is still not finished (that, and the fact that I procrastinated a lot today). I am on my 4th cup of white tea, and am very, very, very much looking forward to sleep.
11/10/2006
Are You Listening, God?
This is totally 2:00 am random talk, so don't mind me, but, as I think about it, one of the qualities that I really require in a partner is his ability to be not just a life companion but an intellectual companion. That intellectual companionship is best evidenced when he can collaborate on writing something with me like a scholarly article.
In fact, when I think about it, I really feel like "writing an article together" is one of the most romantic thing people could do together, of course, assuming that they still like and respect each other after the whole enterprise...
And I guess I just find it incredibly sexy when a man writes to me at all. Not necessariliy love letters, but just well-written pieces of anything. For some reason, all my past boyfriends, while very sweet, have not been prone to putting their thoughts on paper...
In fact, when I think about it, I really feel like "writing an article together" is one of the most romantic thing people could do together, of course, assuming that they still like and respect each other after the whole enterprise...
And I guess I just find it incredibly sexy when a man writes to me at all. Not necessariliy love letters, but just well-written pieces of anything. For some reason, all my past boyfriends, while very sweet, have not been prone to putting their thoughts on paper...
The State of Confusion
So, I'm still in the state of confusion. In addition to possibly not working for a firm this summer (a thought that still takes my breath away every time), I am also rethinking my winter semester plans. My original plan was to go to China to do research for Professor F's class. This week, after looking through the course offerings for the winter semester, I'm increasingly wondering that is the right thing to do. So many good classes to take, and will I really do much "research" in China?!?
So today, I went to the registrar's office, asked about the deadline for making my decision, and bid for a few winter courses that looked interesting to me, among them Constitutional Law Theory, Sexual Orientation and the Law, and Law and Psychiatry.
Speaking of course lotteries, I finally bid for 15 classes today, before the deadline. Everything after #9 was pretty random and was chosen in the spirit of "just in case" rather than "omg!" I don't want to bore you all, so let's just say that my top five choices are:
- Regulation as Justice seminar (with Prof R)
- Constitutional Theory lecture for winter (with Professor K and Professor S - the course description said that these two will engage in a "debate" every class, with questions and input from students... sounds cool doesn't it?)
- Legal Theory course with Professors JH and DK
- Local Goernmetn Law
- Theories of Law seminar with Professor RU
Note that the course selection is heavy on theory, with the possible exception of my first choice, which may be part theory part doctrine.
Still thinking about firms... I knew the decision would be agonizing, but I never thought my thoughts are now centering around "to be or not to be?" rather than "S or C?"
BTW, Firm W, which I interviewed with in DC, never called me. I'm a little bummed about that since I really liked them, and since this is the first time a firm called me back but didn't give me an offer (how dare they? hehe...). I guess I'll live, but I am truly sorry that I didn't look into more DC firms earlier...
Told my parents about what I am thinking in terms of the summer and the firm. They are ... surprised, okay more like shocked, but I guess they trust my judgment and would support me in whatever decision I make. God I hope I know what I'm doing...
Went to a panel this evening, with Professor JH giving a really great speech about social psychology and human nature that made me (and ABS) filled with affection for him. (And I'm happy to say, I played a small part in helping him come up with a topic for the speech). At that moment I realized how happy it is that I'm researching for him. No matter how marginalized JH may be, I believe in his project and I really like him as a person.
So today, I went to the registrar's office, asked about the deadline for making my decision, and bid for a few winter courses that looked interesting to me, among them Constitutional Law Theory, Sexual Orientation and the Law, and Law and Psychiatry.
Speaking of course lotteries, I finally bid for 15 classes today, before the deadline. Everything after #9 was pretty random and was chosen in the spirit of "just in case" rather than "omg!" I don't want to bore you all, so let's just say that my top five choices are:
- Regulation as Justice seminar (with Prof R)
- Constitutional Theory lecture for winter (with Professor K and Professor S - the course description said that these two will engage in a "debate" every class, with questions and input from students... sounds cool doesn't it?)
- Legal Theory course with Professors JH and DK
- Local Goernmetn Law
- Theories of Law seminar with Professor RU
Note that the course selection is heavy on theory, with the possible exception of my first choice, which may be part theory part doctrine.
Still thinking about firms... I knew the decision would be agonizing, but I never thought my thoughts are now centering around "to be or not to be?" rather than "S or C?"
BTW, Firm W, which I interviewed with in DC, never called me. I'm a little bummed about that since I really liked them, and since this is the first time a firm called me back but didn't give me an offer (how dare they? hehe...). I guess I'll live, but I am truly sorry that I didn't look into more DC firms earlier...
Told my parents about what I am thinking in terms of the summer and the firm. They are ... surprised, okay more like shocked, but I guess they trust my judgment and would support me in whatever decision I make. God I hope I know what I'm doing...
Went to a panel this evening, with Professor JH giving a really great speech about social psychology and human nature that made me (and ABS) filled with affection for him. (And I'm happy to say, I played a small part in helping him come up with a topic for the speech). At that moment I realized how happy it is that I'm researching for him. No matter how marginalized JH may be, I believe in his project and I really like him as a person.
11/09/2006
And miles to go before I sleep
I'm a little sad tonight, for a lot of different reasons. I'm thinking a lot about my life, my career, my relationships, this summer and beyond, and where all this is going. I am feeling a great deal of uncertainty, and I'm wondering whether I'm doing the right things and taking the right level of risks and doing what's best for my life.
For instance, should I, perhaps, not even work for any firm at all and just do writing all summer long? Would that provide me with the right amount of financial reward, social relationships, and an expansion of my horizons?
I went to another one of those interminable firm dinners tonight. While the food was very nice, the idea of having to do this all summer long, no matter how fancy the restaurant is, does not appeal to me at all. I may have just been tired, but I also had the misfortune of being seated right next to the hiring partner, who never stopped for one moment selling the firm. He was a very nice man, and clearly smart and successful, but the entire dinner was so boring as a result.
I am also confused and uncertain because of events of a more personal nature, and hope that I did the right thing. I have been thinking a lot about what the "right" thing is for me lately, and what the criteria are and how can one ever tell. I don't think I have had this much angst and self-reflection since I was last a teenager, a not insignificant number of years ago. :)
For instance, should I, perhaps, not even work for any firm at all and just do writing all summer long? Would that provide me with the right amount of financial reward, social relationships, and an expansion of my horizons?
I went to another one of those interminable firm dinners tonight. While the food was very nice, the idea of having to do this all summer long, no matter how fancy the restaurant is, does not appeal to me at all. I may have just been tired, but I also had the misfortune of being seated right next to the hiring partner, who never stopped for one moment selling the firm. He was a very nice man, and clearly smart and successful, but the entire dinner was so boring as a result.
I am also confused and uncertain because of events of a more personal nature, and hope that I did the right thing. I have been thinking a lot about what the "right" thing is for me lately, and what the criteria are and how can one ever tell. I don't think I have had this much angst and self-reflection since I was last a teenager, a not insignificant number of years ago. :)
11/07/2006
Crossing My Fingers...
Please please please remember to vote today, especially if you are a democrat!!!
Some Deep Thoughts about My Career
Due to a failure to screen my calls properly, this evening a partner caught me off-guard, and I was forced to chat on the phone with him for more than 30 minutes, and thereby delaying my sleep time tonight by 30 minutes.
It's a firm that I have kind of crossed off my list too. Sigh...
I am beginning to feel very down about the whole job thing. I am all but fairly certain that I would hate working for a firm. Nothing against the people working or planning to work in firms - if they love it, all the more powers to them -- but I am already beginning to sense how soul-crushing those years of "paying your dues" would feel to me, especially coming right out of law school.
But then, to stay in academia is potentially soul-crushing and ego-crushing in another way. Unless you are really sure you have original scholarship to contribute, why would anyone hire you? I have seen first-hand how the system has chewed people up and spit them out (in 3rd tier law schools mostly, or one endless ghetto fellowships after another... is that really a risk worth taking?)
Or I suppose I could go work for a non-profit, but let's face it, I'm the Petite Bourgeoisie here, with an emphasis on the "Bourgeoisie". I need my endless supply of Starbucks lattes and J Crew wool coats. Would I really be happy barely making ends meet knowing I could be making 5X the amount of money? Sometimes I think I could be... but I'm just not sure...
... Government work? Would I be happy working in that huge bureaucracy..? Prosecuting illegal immigrants and felon in possession of firearms...?
People always say "do what you love to do NOW." But don't they know that preferences and desires are amorphous too? It takes me so much energy just to order from a menu for lunch - I'm the most indecisive person in the world. So how the hell am I supposed to figure out what is it that I "love" to do?
Love... is such a relative thing...
My life hitherto has always moved in stages - a few years here, a few years there, never too long in one place, and I have liked it this way. When I think about it, I sort of can't imagine doing law For The Rest Of My Life. The very thought is scary to me. It makes me claustrophobic.
And yet my life seems to be rapidly shaping up for the firms. And I'm becoming very, very afraid.
It's a firm that I have kind of crossed off my list too. Sigh...
I am beginning to feel very down about the whole job thing. I am all but fairly certain that I would hate working for a firm. Nothing against the people working or planning to work in firms - if they love it, all the more powers to them -- but I am already beginning to sense how soul-crushing those years of "paying your dues" would feel to me, especially coming right out of law school.
But then, to stay in academia is potentially soul-crushing and ego-crushing in another way. Unless you are really sure you have original scholarship to contribute, why would anyone hire you? I have seen first-hand how the system has chewed people up and spit them out (in 3rd tier law schools mostly, or one endless ghetto fellowships after another... is that really a risk worth taking?)
Or I suppose I could go work for a non-profit, but let's face it, I'm the Petite Bourgeoisie here, with an emphasis on the "Bourgeoisie". I need my endless supply of Starbucks lattes and J Crew wool coats. Would I really be happy barely making ends meet knowing I could be making 5X the amount of money? Sometimes I think I could be... but I'm just not sure...
... Government work? Would I be happy working in that huge bureaucracy..? Prosecuting illegal immigrants and felon in possession of firearms...?
People always say "do what you love to do NOW." But don't they know that preferences and desires are amorphous too? It takes me so much energy just to order from a menu for lunch - I'm the most indecisive person in the world. So how the hell am I supposed to figure out what is it that I "love" to do?
Love... is such a relative thing...
My life hitherto has always moved in stages - a few years here, a few years there, never too long in one place, and I have liked it this way. When I think about it, I sort of can't imagine doing law For The Rest Of My Life. The very thought is scary to me. It makes me claustrophobic.
And yet my life seems to be rapidly shaping up for the firms. And I'm becoming very, very afraid.
11/06/2006
Course Lottery, Again...
In case you were wondering, Professor F left early today to go to Berlin, my favorite city in the world! So no OH today. I guess I'll save my brilliant questions for him for next week.
It's that time of the year again -- lottery for courses! It seems like I'm always lotterying for courses, doesn't it? Well, after looking over the schedule today (with ABS, of course, who is obsessed with this stuff), here are my picks:
1. Regulation as Justice seminar, (basically administrative law), with really distinguished and connected Professor R.
2. Legal Theory seminar, with the prof I'm RAing for, Professor JH, and supposedly brilliant though incomprehensible Critical Legal Theory guru Professor DK.
3. seminar on "Law and Human Behavior" taught by famous professor CS from rival law school. I think it's a course about behavioral economics? Though I'm not entirely sure. I just picked the course based on the prof and not on the subject matter (as you probably can tell already).
4. Seminar on Con law and Immigration Law with new hire from rival school Professor GN, who was, of all things, a math genius (or something) before he decided to switch careers and become a law professor (and he's not even doing IP or anything, just straight con law and immigration law!)
5. Some weird class on "taboo subjects" with super-famous and flamboyant crim law professor AD. I personally don't like his reputation much, but thought wth? I'm sure I won't get it though.
6. Local Government Law, the only lecture I'm bidding for, with relatively young prof DB. He's supposed to be really nice and helpful, though I have also heard some bad stuff about him, i.e. he tries a bit too hard, and can get peevish, etc. I'm not crazy about taking a lecture course, but let's see.
Anyway, sorry for boring all of you, but those are all the courses I'm bidding for at the moment. Hopefully I'll get into at least a few of them...
It's that time of the year again -- lottery for courses! It seems like I'm always lotterying for courses, doesn't it? Well, after looking over the schedule today (with ABS, of course, who is obsessed with this stuff), here are my picks:
1. Regulation as Justice seminar, (basically administrative law), with really distinguished and connected Professor R.
2. Legal Theory seminar, with the prof I'm RAing for, Professor JH, and supposedly brilliant though incomprehensible Critical Legal Theory guru Professor DK.
3. seminar on "Law and Human Behavior" taught by famous professor CS from rival law school. I think it's a course about behavioral economics? Though I'm not entirely sure. I just picked the course based on the prof and not on the subject matter (as you probably can tell already).
4. Seminar on Con law and Immigration Law with new hire from rival school Professor GN, who was, of all things, a math genius (or something) before he decided to switch careers and become a law professor (and he's not even doing IP or anything, just straight con law and immigration law!)
5. Some weird class on "taboo subjects" with super-famous and flamboyant crim law professor AD. I personally don't like his reputation much, but thought wth? I'm sure I won't get it though.
6. Local Government Law, the only lecture I'm bidding for, with relatively young prof DB. He's supposed to be really nice and helpful, though I have also heard some bad stuff about him, i.e. he tries a bit too hard, and can get peevish, etc. I'm not crazy about taking a lecture course, but let's see.
Anyway, sorry for boring all of you, but those are all the courses I'm bidding for at the moment. Hopefully I'll get into at least a few of them...
Redemption
I'm sitting in the lounge at school, preparing for another meeting with Professor F... one in which I will hopefully redeem myself from the sad meeting I had with him last week. Wish me luck...
11/05/2006
Another New Week
It's been a weekend filled with drama, and as a result, I didn't get much work done. Yesterday was spent pleasantly with Dickie wandering around in DC, then taking the shuttle back to B-Town. At night I began to feel the onset of illness, and slept ~11 hours in total. Today, after some major drama in the morning (let's just say that someone is not too happy with me right now - and no, it's not my ex(?)-Boyfriend.) went to dim sum with AC, J, and her husband. Conversations were in general pleasant, though I was understandably distracted.
Came back and prepared furiously for the mass subcite tonight with my cute and cuddly subciters. Preparing for stuff was hell, but when they actually started working it was amazingly efficient, and ended even before the alloted deadlines.
Then came home, thought about callling parents but the phone card somehow didn't work. Read more of the stpuid comparative con law reading -- so dry, so boring, so dense... argh why would Professor MT do this to us?? Anyway, read a bunch of those dense pages and decided that this was not worth it, and that I should just have some dessert instead and go to bed. Sadly, before I formulated the plan I tolk some Ambien. So of course now I'm sitting in bed with jars, pots, and bins and boxes of sweets surrounding me. And being not good at self-control , I ate 5-6 butter cookies, then perhaps another 3 macaroons, and quie a few of those rice crispy salty treats, and finally the "white bunny" candy I got from Chinatown today.
After this, I'll go to sleep. Already losing consciousness fast...
Came back and prepared furiously for the mass subcite tonight with my cute and cuddly subciters. Preparing for stuff was hell, but when they actually started working it was amazingly efficient, and ended even before the alloted deadlines.
Then came home, thought about callling parents but the phone card somehow didn't work. Read more of the stpuid comparative con law reading -- so dry, so boring, so dense... argh why would Professor MT do this to us?? Anyway, read a bunch of those dense pages and decided that this was not worth it, and that I should just have some dessert instead and go to bed. Sadly, before I formulated the plan I tolk some Ambien. So of course now I'm sitting in bed with jars, pots, and bins and boxes of sweets surrounding me. And being not good at self-control , I ate 5-6 butter cookies, then perhaps another 3 macaroons, and quie a few of those rice crispy salty treats, and finally the "white bunny" candy I got from Chinatown today.
After this, I'll go to sleep. Already losing consciousness fast...
11/03/2006
In the Nation's Capital
I came to DC today to interview at Firm W, my last interview this year, which AG helped me set up. The firm is in a very nice part of DC near Dupont Circle, with two Starbucks within 1 block, which counts as a great neighborhood in my dictionary. :)
The interviews went well. Since my screening interview was a phone interview rather than an in-person one, I finally met the partner who interviewed me for the first time -- he is 6'7", well-built, peppered hair, very good-looking with a crooked smile and a deep voice (well I already knew about the deep voice.) Anyway, the associates who took me out for coffee (well, tea actually) all seemed star-struck with him, and he was in turn flirtatious with them. Interesting...
I am hanging out with Dickie in the Ritz Carlton. We went out for sushi and Chinese food tonight (for some reason whenever we get together we always have two dinners - we are such gluttons), and Dickie absolutely stuffed himself while I ate more moderately. We then walked around and finally returned to the hotel, where we are going to have a fun girl's night in - snacking, watching TV, and doing beauty regimes.
The weather got so cold today. Thank god I got my J Crew coat yesterday!
The interviews went well. Since my screening interview was a phone interview rather than an in-person one, I finally met the partner who interviewed me for the first time -- he is 6'7", well-built, peppered hair, very good-looking with a crooked smile and a deep voice (well I already knew about the deep voice.) Anyway, the associates who took me out for coffee (well, tea actually) all seemed star-struck with him, and he was in turn flirtatious with them. Interesting...
I am hanging out with Dickie in the Ritz Carlton. We went out for sushi and Chinese food tonight (for some reason whenever we get together we always have two dinners - we are such gluttons), and Dickie absolutely stuffed himself while I ate more moderately. We then walked around and finally returned to the hotel, where we are going to have a fun girl's night in - snacking, watching TV, and doing beauty regimes.
The weather got so cold today. Thank god I got my J Crew coat yesterday!
10/31/2006
Better
Well, in case you are wondering, I feel better. Being able to have social interaction helped. Having a ton of work that took my mind off my sorrows helped. Having the most useless office hours ever with Professor F also helped (Never go to a Prof's office hours when you don't know what to say... this is a lesson forever learned - I must have sounded so ditzy and stupid). And finally, tonight I got a nice email from (Ex?-)Boyfriend, which put my mind at ease and made me very relieved. I guess a lot of the anguish came from worrying about him, and now I know that he's okay. So all good, at least relatively speaking.
In other news, however, I am somehow once again more than 100 pages behind in the reading for comparative con law. This is definitive proof, I think, that Professor T is crazy. Nuts. I guess I won't be prepared for class tomorrow, since I also have two reaction papers for the two workshops due in the next two days, and there is just no way.
Tomorrow is Halloween (well, really today, but today is still yesterday since I haven't gone to sleep yet.) I don't have anything that I want to be (or can be without a lot of time investment which I don't have). But might still go to the Halloween party with AC and J.
In other news, however, I am somehow once again more than 100 pages behind in the reading for comparative con law. This is definitive proof, I think, that Professor T is crazy. Nuts. I guess I won't be prepared for class tomorrow, since I also have two reaction papers for the two workshops due in the next two days, and there is just no way.
Tomorrow is Halloween (well, really today, but today is still yesterday since I haven't gone to sleep yet.) I don't have anything that I want to be (or can be without a lot of time investment which I don't have). But might still go to the Halloween party with AC and J.
10/30/2006
Tell Me, Why-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y?
Annie Lennox's "Why" is the perfect breakup song, no matter which side of the breakup you're on.
I have listened to it for thousands of times today. The neighbors must be getting annoyed.
I have listened to it for thousands of times today. The neighbors must be getting annoyed.
10/29/2006
Europe After the Rain
It's another day. Windy, cold, though not rainy anymore.
I am slightly more active today. Was able to sleep more, eat more, and read more of the unbearably boring comparative con law reading. Read a very interesting, though very awkwardly written, paper for my health law policy seminar. Went to Starbucks in the afternoon for a bit. It was very crowded.
Talked to Dickie and G in China and my parents and SF...
Then, just as I always do when I'm depressed, I went and bought myself the very pretty, but very expensive, green silk scarf from a Japanese store near my house that I have always wanted. It was $50, but it made me happy. Hooray for retail therapy...
ABS came back to C-Town tonight and we had dinner. I told him the news and he was not shocked. He's known about my concerns with Boyfriend for a while, and we have just talked about them the week before we left for interviews and callback visits. He is also the only person among my friends who have reservations about whether it was the right decision, since he likes my Boyfriend and also has a bit of prejudice about the niceness (or the lack thereof) of straight males.
Came back and read more comparative con law, and literally was bored out of my mind. A lot of it, I think, is the European academic's style of writing. Unlike American academics, who tend to make their writing more lively or animated, Europeans tend to stick to a very dry, detached, and passive style. Not engaging at all, and usually rather theoretical and abstract. The few American authors that our professor included in the casebooks are much easier reading, but the European authors (and that's most of the casebook) are driving me up the wall...
Am still sad, but getting better. I go back and forth though, so perhaps it's too early to tell...
I am slightly more active today. Was able to sleep more, eat more, and read more of the unbearably boring comparative con law reading. Read a very interesting, though very awkwardly written, paper for my health law policy seminar. Went to Starbucks in the afternoon for a bit. It was very crowded.
Talked to Dickie and G in China and my parents and SF...
Then, just as I always do when I'm depressed, I went and bought myself the very pretty, but very expensive, green silk scarf from a Japanese store near my house that I have always wanted. It was $50, but it made me happy. Hooray for retail therapy...
ABS came back to C-Town tonight and we had dinner. I told him the news and he was not shocked. He's known about my concerns with Boyfriend for a while, and we have just talked about them the week before we left for interviews and callback visits. He is also the only person among my friends who have reservations about whether it was the right decision, since he likes my Boyfriend and also has a bit of prejudice about the niceness (or the lack thereof) of straight males.
Came back and read more comparative con law, and literally was bored out of my mind. A lot of it, I think, is the European academic's style of writing. Unlike American academics, who tend to make their writing more lively or animated, Europeans tend to stick to a very dry, detached, and passive style. Not engaging at all, and usually rather theoretical and abstract. The few American authors that our professor included in the casebooks are much easier reading, but the European authors (and that's most of the casebook) are driving me up the wall...
Am still sad, but getting better. I go back and forth though, so perhaps it's too early to tell...
10/28/2006
Tragedy
Well, as of last night, the relationship between Boyfriend and me appears to be over. Even though I was the one who instigated this, it was not any less painful. We talked for many hours, then Boyfriend packed up and drove back to N-Town in the middle of the night. I suspect that seeing him gathering his stuff around my apartment will be the most terrible and haunting memory I will have for quite a while.
I spent today disoriented, alternately grieving and numb, and exhausted. (And appropriately, today it was rainy and gloomy all day, and I hardly went outside.)
It's going to take me a long time to get over this.
I spent today disoriented, alternately grieving and numb, and exhausted. (And appropriately, today it was rainy and gloomy all day, and I hardly went outside.)
It's going to take me a long time to get over this.
10/26/2006
An Even More Unproductive Day
I read some con law, and that's about it. Did nearly nothing else, but the day was so pleasant because of it.
:D Coffee/dinner/long conversation with AG.
:( cold weather.
:D Coffee/dinner/long conversation with AG.
:( cold weather.
10/24/2006
Unproductive Day
So, I had an unproductive day today, even though I got a (relatively) early start. I woke up around 9:45, and then just stayed in bed for 3.5 hours surfing the net and chatting with people. Finally, around 1:30, I got dressed, showered, and sauntered out the door to run various errands and to eat on campus. I read a bit of comparative con law at the cafeteria, but got seriously discouraged when I realized that to fulfill my goal I would have to read 350 pages - I'm not kidding. I told you that my professor is insane.
I read about 60 pages of that today, and while the reading is pretty interesting, it is also theoretical, abstract, and obstruse at times, so I think 60 pages in one day is quite enough. Soon it will be time to skim, but not yet.
ABS called me in the evening, and we chatted a little bit. Both of the partners from firm S called or emailed me with friendly messages today, which was nice. I have no idea how I'm going to make my decision at this point, but I think I will wait until the offer dinners to see who else from my law school got offers, ... and whether I like them. Right now, it's betwen firm S and firm C, and I like firm S slightly better.
Tomorrow's goal: read con law; read health law policy; read political economy. (Hopefully those combined will not be 350 pages!); start on my reaction paper. I also have the rather enjoyable task of going to professor H's office hours (to chat), and having dinner with long lost friends JM, RH, and possibly some others. Really looking forward to that as well.
:D rested; did some work.
:( have more work than I realized. Perhaps my plan for my mini-vacation is overly ambitious...
I read about 60 pages of that today, and while the reading is pretty interesting, it is also theoretical, abstract, and obstruse at times, so I think 60 pages in one day is quite enough. Soon it will be time to skim, but not yet.
ABS called me in the evening, and we chatted a little bit. Both of the partners from firm S called or emailed me with friendly messages today, which was nice. I have no idea how I'm going to make my decision at this point, but I think I will wait until the offer dinners to see who else from my law school got offers, ... and whether I like them. Right now, it's betwen firm S and firm C, and I like firm S slightly better.
Tomorrow's goal: read con law; read health law policy; read political economy. (Hopefully those combined will not be 350 pages!); start on my reaction paper. I also have the rather enjoyable task of going to professor H's office hours (to chat), and having dinner with long lost friends JM, RH, and possibly some others. Really looking forward to that as well.
:D rested; did some work.
:( have more work than I realized. Perhaps my plan for my mini-vacation is overly ambitious...
10/23/2006
Offer #3
Really liked Firm S. So now have yet another option to contend with.
Back in C-town now. Vegging and reading a little bit. Tomorrow I have to start my odyssey of finishing comparative con law reading. It's not going to be fun...
Back in C-town now. Vegging and reading a little bit. Tomorrow I have to start my odyssey of finishing comparative con law reading. It's not going to be fun...
10/22/2006
Another Day in NYC
So... I'm sitting here, alone in the hotel. It's not as bad as it sounds. I flew in this afternoon, took a cab to the hotel, and immediately met up with my friend GQ and his girlfriend E and had dinner at a super-posh beautiful Japanese restaurant in SoHo. GQ is working for firm F right now in New York as a third year, and in spite of all the busyness of BIgLaw firm life (which he freely admits) he really likes his work, though E complains that his schedule is a little too crazy and unpredictable.
After meeting with GQ and E, they gave me a ride to the restaurant where I'm meeting my good friend from college, SF and HIS on-again, off-again girlfriend L, whom I like a whole lot mainly because she reminds me somewhat of myself, and because she's beautiful and smart and thoughtful, which is also why it has always been a little sad to see her and SF struggle through their relationship. We had a lovely dinner (well, I didn't have dinner, but only a glass of wine). The conversation flowed freely. Both SF and L are applying to English grad schools, so I heard about that, and told them about law school and my interests and my fear about law firms and my (very nascent) aspirations for academia.
Then caught a cab and got back to the hotel. Getting up bright and early tomorrow for my interview - not that stressed, but still want to make a good impressions.
:D Having a string of emails in my inbox that I very much enjoy reading.
:( nothing, really. I've even caught up on my sleep!
After meeting with GQ and E, they gave me a ride to the restaurant where I'm meeting my good friend from college, SF and HIS on-again, off-again girlfriend L, whom I like a whole lot mainly because she reminds me somewhat of myself, and because she's beautiful and smart and thoughtful, which is also why it has always been a little sad to see her and SF struggle through their relationship. We had a lovely dinner (well, I didn't have dinner, but only a glass of wine). The conversation flowed freely. Both SF and L are applying to English grad schools, so I heard about that, and told them about law school and my interests and my fear about law firms and my (very nascent) aspirations for academia.
Then caught a cab and got back to the hotel. Getting up bright and early tomorrow for my interview - not that stressed, but still want to make a good impressions.
:D Having a string of emails in my inbox that I very much enjoy reading.
:( nothing, really. I've even caught up on my sleep!
10/21/2006
Another Offer, and Some Hard Choices
I spent yesterday in NYC, interviewing at firm C, which was originally my second choice, and which now, through the permutations of OCI, has become my first choice. :)
I really liked the firm. It is in a less flashy, touristy part of town, smaller, and has a very elegant office. There is gorgeous artwork displayed on the wall, beautiful dark wood paneling everywhere, and very expensive-looking rugs everywhere. The chairs, couches, and tables all look like antiques - they have silk, embroidered covers and heavy wood frames. Closets are hidden by wood paneling; walls have wood accents; overhead lighting in the hall are recessed and muted. Everything screamed "Old, affluent New York." This is in sharp contrast to the corporate sterility of the firm S, where I was at last week.
Firm C had an all day interview process that at first sounded very intimidating, but which turned out to be a very good thing, since you are able to talk to the partners at your leisure and are not constrained by time. This means that as long as the conversation is going well, you can ask every questions that occurs to you to your heart's content. One of the partners and I ended up talking for nearly two hours, completely losing track of time and pushing my lunch back almost an hour. The two poor associates who were supposed to take me out to lunch had to wait until 1:30 and must have been starved.
The partners at C all seemed intellectual, energetic, impressive, and humane. That last part I was not expecting, but was pleased to find. Every partner also explained the firm's unique philosophy to me, which, I increasingly realized as the day went on, is really a unique system which sets their firm apart from others. The rules and institution of the firm are designed to eliminate destructive individual competition among partners and among associates, and make people more loyal to the firm as an institution. As far as I can tell, this system has worked. Even people I have met who no longer work at the firm (what the firm calls "alumni") have very positive things to say about firm C. People seem to really believe in their system and feel a great deal of loyalty and pride.
Firm C gave me an offer at the end of my interviews. I was of course very happy. On the way to the airport, I realized that there is a very good chance I will go there, and that the interviews next week are likely to be a waste of time. So, today, I sat down and cancelled most of my interviews next week except for one. I was planning to spend nearly the entire week in NY, but now I will actually be in C-Town for most of the week.
The only thing that is not ideal about firm C is its domesticness. In spite of being one of the elite firms, it has no (NO!) Asia office and does not have plans to have one. Since I may be interested in practicing law overseas, I am a bit worried that C's domesticness could very quickly become something I find frustrating. In this sense, firm S's sprawling offices and aggressive expansion may fit better with my goals (not to mention that I am rather enamored by the idea of spending a summer in Hong Kong!) Boyfriend and I spent some time last night discussing this, and he wrote me a long email dissecting the situation this morning. He thinks that firm C's failure to expand into the Asian market means that in spite of its eliteness, it will become increasingly marginalized in the next few decades. I'm really not sure what to think.
So, some hard choices ahead, but at least I have got some good options and a MUCH easier flyout week than I had previously expected. Next week, I expect to do a lot of catching up on work, and even more catching up on sleep! :D
I really liked the firm. It is in a less flashy, touristy part of town, smaller, and has a very elegant office. There is gorgeous artwork displayed on the wall, beautiful dark wood paneling everywhere, and very expensive-looking rugs everywhere. The chairs, couches, and tables all look like antiques - they have silk, embroidered covers and heavy wood frames. Closets are hidden by wood paneling; walls have wood accents; overhead lighting in the hall are recessed and muted. Everything screamed "Old, affluent New York." This is in sharp contrast to the corporate sterility of the firm S, where I was at last week.
Firm C had an all day interview process that at first sounded very intimidating, but which turned out to be a very good thing, since you are able to talk to the partners at your leisure and are not constrained by time. This means that as long as the conversation is going well, you can ask every questions that occurs to you to your heart's content. One of the partners and I ended up talking for nearly two hours, completely losing track of time and pushing my lunch back almost an hour. The two poor associates who were supposed to take me out to lunch had to wait until 1:30 and must have been starved.
The partners at C all seemed intellectual, energetic, impressive, and humane. That last part I was not expecting, but was pleased to find. Every partner also explained the firm's unique philosophy to me, which, I increasingly realized as the day went on, is really a unique system which sets their firm apart from others. The rules and institution of the firm are designed to eliminate destructive individual competition among partners and among associates, and make people more loyal to the firm as an institution. As far as I can tell, this system has worked. Even people I have met who no longer work at the firm (what the firm calls "alumni") have very positive things to say about firm C. People seem to really believe in their system and feel a great deal of loyalty and pride.
Firm C gave me an offer at the end of my interviews. I was of course very happy. On the way to the airport, I realized that there is a very good chance I will go there, and that the interviews next week are likely to be a waste of time. So, today, I sat down and cancelled most of my interviews next week except for one. I was planning to spend nearly the entire week in NY, but now I will actually be in C-Town for most of the week.
The only thing that is not ideal about firm C is its domesticness. In spite of being one of the elite firms, it has no (NO!) Asia office and does not have plans to have one. Since I may be interested in practicing law overseas, I am a bit worried that C's domesticness could very quickly become something I find frustrating. In this sense, firm S's sprawling offices and aggressive expansion may fit better with my goals (not to mention that I am rather enamored by the idea of spending a summer in Hong Kong!) Boyfriend and I spent some time last night discussing this, and he wrote me a long email dissecting the situation this morning. He thinks that firm C's failure to expand into the Asian market means that in spite of its eliteness, it will become increasingly marginalized in the next few decades. I'm really not sure what to think.
So, some hard choices ahead, but at least I have got some good options and a MUCH easier flyout week than I had previously expected. Next week, I expect to do a lot of catching up on work, and even more catching up on sleep! :D
10/18/2006
Delirious
Why am I still awake? I slept 4 hours last night, going to sleep at 3:30 and waking up at 7:30. Comparative con law was a blur, since I hadn't read and was really in danger of falling asleep constantly. Con law was not much better, although the prof was more engaging and made us laugh a few times. Then I had lunch with J; then read some more articles for the research project and handed the articles to Professor S's assistant. Then I barely had 20 minutes to skim 20 pages of reading for Local Government Law, and it was off to class again!
Today was the last class of Comparative Local Government Law this semester, for which I feel a little sad. I am very fond of Professor F. and really fascinated by his work, though I really don't feel like I have the hang of it yet. Not having taken the main class he usually teaches, Local Government Law, I feel like there are so many conceptual things I don't get. The class right now is weirdly theoretical and yet our discussions mainly focus on the practical aspects, with me feeling like I have no handle on either very well.
Everyone in the class is choosing a city to focus on for the next 5 months, and we will be researching and then writing a paper and presenting it to the class in the spring. My city is Nanjing. I'm not sure why I chose that exactly. I wanted to choose a medium-sized city in the south of China (so the temperature is not too low in the winter) that is not too well-known, and I wanted one that I haven't been to. I am planning to visit in the winter and to do field research, not that I know what THAT means either.
So after getting the offer from the firm that I interviewed with on Friday, I can now enter the process of next week so much more relaxed. I am lining up other interviews, and plan to fly to Chicago in the latter part of the week and then spend the weekend with ABS, which should be fun. I am also contacting a bunch of friends who live in New York so we can hang out when I'm in town.
Reading "Persons and Masks of the Law" by John Noonan tonight - in preparation for my meeting with Professor M, who recommended the book. The book is about how the legal system too often focuses on rules rather than persons, at the expense of the person and of justice. It looks at three cases and talks about them in-depth, giving the background and the history and showing how in each, the person has been sacrificed in preference for the rules.
I really like the book so far, but am not sure how to continue the discussion once that book is written and that idea is advanced. What to do to put the person at the center of the legal system rather than rules? Is it possible and is it desirable?
I have now come into contact with so many different ways of approaching legal questions, and so many different fields (though there are still so many more that I haven't yet learned about). With the possible exception of pure doctrinal stuff and pure law and (classical) econ, I find almost every single one of them fascinating. The problem in the next stage is to pick a field - and to write something worthwhile. I guess I can think of it as my last struggle against the certainties of the firm life. "Rage - Rage against the dying of the light"...?
Today was the last class of Comparative Local Government Law this semester, for which I feel a little sad. I am very fond of Professor F. and really fascinated by his work, though I really don't feel like I have the hang of it yet. Not having taken the main class he usually teaches, Local Government Law, I feel like there are so many conceptual things I don't get. The class right now is weirdly theoretical and yet our discussions mainly focus on the practical aspects, with me feeling like I have no handle on either very well.
Everyone in the class is choosing a city to focus on for the next 5 months, and we will be researching and then writing a paper and presenting it to the class in the spring. My city is Nanjing. I'm not sure why I chose that exactly. I wanted to choose a medium-sized city in the south of China (so the temperature is not too low in the winter) that is not too well-known, and I wanted one that I haven't been to. I am planning to visit in the winter and to do field research, not that I know what THAT means either.
So after getting the offer from the firm that I interviewed with on Friday, I can now enter the process of next week so much more relaxed. I am lining up other interviews, and plan to fly to Chicago in the latter part of the week and then spend the weekend with ABS, which should be fun. I am also contacting a bunch of friends who live in New York so we can hang out when I'm in town.
Reading "Persons and Masks of the Law" by John Noonan tonight - in preparation for my meeting with Professor M, who recommended the book. The book is about how the legal system too often focuses on rules rather than persons, at the expense of the person and of justice. It looks at three cases and talks about them in-depth, giving the background and the history and showing how in each, the person has been sacrificed in preference for the rules.
I really like the book so far, but am not sure how to continue the discussion once that book is written and that idea is advanced. What to do to put the person at the center of the legal system rather than rules? Is it possible and is it desirable?
I have now come into contact with so many different ways of approaching legal questions, and so many different fields (though there are still so many more that I haven't yet learned about). With the possible exception of pure doctrinal stuff and pure law and (classical) econ, I find almost every single one of them fascinating. The problem in the next stage is to pick a field - and to write something worthwhile. I guess I can think of it as my last struggle against the certainties of the firm life. "Rage - Rage against the dying of the light"...?
10/16/2006
10/15/2006
Realization
This is pretty random, but today I was sitting on the train back to C-Town, and all of a sudden it hit me: as little as 150 years ago, this country had SLAVES. Freakin' SLAVES! Just like the ancient Egyptians, who built the pyramids! American slaves carried an entire southern economy on their backs.
For a while, I just sat there trying to wrap my mind around the barbarism of it all.
I guess up 'til now, all this talk about southern slavery has always just passed over me, and I never thought about it with understanding and concreteness. Somehow in my mind, I have always categorized American slavery as something categorically differnet from, say, Egyptian slavery. But it hit me today that it is every bit as barbaric, and probably even more so b/c our society actually had claims to enightened concepts like quality or freedom or autonomy.
I can imagine the frustration of the abolitionist now from that era, literaly sick with disgust at the society that is at once modern and yet somehow still tolerating an ancient and horrendous anomaly. What a horrible tarnish to have on our nation's history.
For a while, I just sat there trying to wrap my mind around the barbarism of it all.
I guess up 'til now, all this talk about southern slavery has always just passed over me, and I never thought about it with understanding and concreteness. Somehow in my mind, I have always categorized American slavery as something categorically differnet from, say, Egyptian slavery. But it hit me today that it is every bit as barbaric, and probably even more so b/c our society actually had claims to enightened concepts like quality or freedom or autonomy.
I can imagine the frustration of the abolitionist now from that era, literaly sick with disgust at the society that is at once modern and yet somehow still tolerating an ancient and horrendous anomaly. What a horrible tarnish to have on our nation's history.
10/14/2006
Back in C-Town
I have done nearly no work today. I am reading con law, drinking an Earl Grey with soy milk, chatting with 2 friends on IM, missing 2 parties, and plan to go to sleep in about an hour. Tomorrow will be a full day of RAing (again), but at least, for the moment, different areas of my life are under control.
Hanging out with my parents has been fun. We went to a big Chinese buffet place for lunch today, and talked about law and narrative and my philosophy about parenting. My parents are really curious about the interviews with those law firms, and had lot of fun listening to my descriptions of them.
Slept almost the entire way on the train ride back to C-Town, and am still tired. I think it will take a least a 2-week long vacation to recover my sleep deficit.
Hanging out with my parents has been fun. We went to a big Chinese buffet place for lunch today, and talked about law and narrative and my philosophy about parenting. My parents are really curious about the interviews with those law firms, and had lot of fun listening to my descriptions of them.
Slept almost the entire way on the train ride back to C-Town, and am still tired. I think it will take a least a 2-week long vacation to recover my sleep deficit.
10/13/2006
End of OCI
My OCI season has ended with a modest bang -- yesterday I interviewed with the top choice firm that I wanted to work for on campus - then the same night, I flew to NYC to do my first callback interview, at one of the top5 firms.
My #2 choice firm called me today for a callback visit, but I haven't heard from my top choice firm yet -- it's kind of a long shot for even very good students since they hire so few people, but I really hope I get a callback because I admire them a lot.
My first callback interview today was initially intimidating, but ultimately went well. The firm is located in one of the busiest and most crowded part of town, in a beatiful building. Even I, who don't like New York very much, was impressed in spite of myself.
The firm itself is nice but a bit depressing. I can't quite picture myself there yet. It looked very corporate - people in suits - bare offices - sallow faces of overworked people... Yes, the view of midtown from the windows are of course stunning, but how often will I really be able to enjoy the view?
I interviewed with two associats and two partners - and finally learned what "private equity," "capital structure," and "merger and acquisition" are. Yes, I'm sad, and so NOT fit to do corporate work. The associates who interviewed me seemed a bit reticent and not really warm. They seem to treat the interview very much like a job and so just wanted to get it over with. One of the partners was nice. The other one was so-so.
I'm back in parent's house to visit them for the weekend before they go to China next week.
I'm feeling really pensive about my future today. I love law school, -- I love the people here, I love the intellectual environment, I love the ready accessibility of camaraderie and good conversations. I'm almost heartbroken at having to leave it. I know I won't have to for another year and a half, but I can already feel it. It will just be like leaving my undergraduate institution - being thrown into the cold, harsh world.
I think today, I saw a glimpse of that cold harsh world and imagined myself being inside it, which made me shudder. To be sure, it's a cold, harsh world very attractively packaged, and there could certainly be worse things. But it's still the world, and not the comfortable coccoon that I have been living in for the past year and a half, where I could think to my heart's content about justice and power and how law influences people's behavior and whether economic misses equity concerns. Words like "capital structure," "IPO," and "document review" don't even enter my consciousness.
...Maybe I should give academia some more thoughts?
My #2 choice firm called me today for a callback visit, but I haven't heard from my top choice firm yet -- it's kind of a long shot for even very good students since they hire so few people, but I really hope I get a callback because I admire them a lot.
My first callback interview today was initially intimidating, but ultimately went well. The firm is located in one of the busiest and most crowded part of town, in a beatiful building. Even I, who don't like New York very much, was impressed in spite of myself.
The firm itself is nice but a bit depressing. I can't quite picture myself there yet. It looked very corporate - people in suits - bare offices - sallow faces of overworked people... Yes, the view of midtown from the windows are of course stunning, but how often will I really be able to enjoy the view?
I interviewed with two associats and two partners - and finally learned what "private equity," "capital structure," and "merger and acquisition" are. Yes, I'm sad, and so NOT fit to do corporate work. The associates who interviewed me seemed a bit reticent and not really warm. They seem to treat the interview very much like a job and so just wanted to get it over with. One of the partners was nice. The other one was so-so.
I'm back in parent's house to visit them for the weekend before they go to China next week.
I'm feeling really pensive about my future today. I love law school, -- I love the people here, I love the intellectual environment, I love the ready accessibility of camaraderie and good conversations. I'm almost heartbroken at having to leave it. I know I won't have to for another year and a half, but I can already feel it. It will just be like leaving my undergraduate institution - being thrown into the cold, harsh world.
I think today, I saw a glimpse of that cold harsh world and imagined myself being inside it, which made me shudder. To be sure, it's a cold, harsh world very attractively packaged, and there could certainly be worse things. But it's still the world, and not the comfortable coccoon that I have been living in for the past year and a half, where I could think to my heart's content about justice and power and how law influences people's behavior and whether economic misses equity concerns. Words like "capital structure," "IPO," and "document review" don't even enter my consciousness.
...Maybe I should give academia some more thoughts?
10/09/2006
Foot-in-Mouth Disease
Interviewed with a Top 5 Firms today, and said my most embarrassing thing yet.
Me: I know it's a long time since you were an associate, but...
Interviewer (white woman, in her late 30s, looking offended, interrupting me): I'm not THAT old.
Me: Um, sorry...
The rest of the interview wasn't that much better either. Oh well. Guess I won't be getting a callback from THEM.
Me: I know it's a long time since you were an associate, but...
Interviewer (white woman, in her late 30s, looking offended, interrupting me): I'm not THAT old.
Me: Um, sorry...
The rest of the interview wasn't that much better either. Oh well. Guess I won't be getting a callback from THEM.
10/08/2006
Numbers
40
The number of hours I spent this week on Professor H's research assignment, at least.
6
The number of hours I slept last night and the night before, each.
102
My current weight, in pound, after not sleeping and barely eating for a week. Time to have some protein shakes.
1
The number of drinks I had at S and AC's joint birthday party in B-Town, which was nonetheless sufficient to give me a headache the next day; the number of glasses of wine I plan to have this afternoon at the sports bar, where I'll be watching some football games with Boyfriend.
7, 15, 12
The number of interviews I will have next week, the number of interviews I've had, and the number of callbacks I got so far.
140
The number of pages I have to read for comparative con law before I catch up. (This is truly absurd... and will never happen.)
11
Time I plan on going to bed tonight, hopefully.
The number of hours I spent this week on Professor H's research assignment, at least.
6
The number of hours I slept last night and the night before, each.
102
My current weight, in pound, after not sleeping and barely eating for a week. Time to have some protein shakes.
1
The number of drinks I had at S and AC's joint birthday party in B-Town, which was nonetheless sufficient to give me a headache the next day; the number of glasses of wine I plan to have this afternoon at the sports bar, where I'll be watching some football games with Boyfriend.
7, 15, 12
The number of interviews I will have next week, the number of interviews I've had, and the number of callbacks I got so far.
140
The number of pages I have to read for comparative con law before I catch up. (This is truly absurd... and will never happen.)
11
Time I plan on going to bed tonight, hopefully.
10/06/2006
Callback / Procrastination
Interviewed with a top 5 firm today, and really connected with my interviewer, who is a smart, thoughful, and intellectual man who graduated from both of my alma maters, only in reverse.
He is only 51 but has had a very impressive career, working as a highly successful federal prosecutor for several years, winning some high-profiled trials, and then leaving the government and going to the firm to start his own practice group.
For some reason, from the very beginning, we just really clicked, and I felt enogh confidence to speak very frankly about my thoughts on law firms and my career and my uncertainties, and also asked him about his career and life choices, which were truly amazing, by the way.
I got the callback tonight, by phone. As far as I can tell, no one else has gotten a callback yet. A lot of people have interviewed for that firm -- the hotel at which these interviews are held were just mobbed today, and about 15 people or so hung out around the hospitality suite constantly at any given time, trying to schmooze with the lawyers. I usually hate these scenes, and left as quickly as I could after the interview, thinking about the conversation I had, and how cool it would be if I worked for his practice group.
I have not been considering his firm seriously before, but after meeting him, I am going to give it some serious thought.
So it's 1:26 am, and I'm still working on writing this paragraph and footnote for Prof. H's paper. I'm exhausted and really should be asleep by now, but wasted a lot of time earlier this evening, so now I'm paying the price in sleep!
:D The many ego boosts of OCI. Yes, I know it's idiotic, but I'm not above it. I can totally see, however, that this is how they begin to draw you in...
:( too little sleep, and way too much work.
He is only 51 but has had a very impressive career, working as a highly successful federal prosecutor for several years, winning some high-profiled trials, and then leaving the government and going to the firm to start his own practice group.
For some reason, from the very beginning, we just really clicked, and I felt enogh confidence to speak very frankly about my thoughts on law firms and my career and my uncertainties, and also asked him about his career and life choices, which were truly amazing, by the way.
I got the callback tonight, by phone. As far as I can tell, no one else has gotten a callback yet. A lot of people have interviewed for that firm -- the hotel at which these interviews are held were just mobbed today, and about 15 people or so hung out around the hospitality suite constantly at any given time, trying to schmooze with the lawyers. I usually hate these scenes, and left as quickly as I could after the interview, thinking about the conversation I had, and how cool it would be if I worked for his practice group.
I have not been considering his firm seriously before, but after meeting him, I am going to give it some serious thought.
So it's 1:26 am, and I'm still working on writing this paragraph and footnote for Prof. H's paper. I'm exhausted and really should be asleep by now, but wasted a lot of time earlier this evening, so now I'm paying the price in sleep!
:D The many ego boosts of OCI. Yes, I know it's idiotic, but I'm not above it. I can totally see, however, that this is how they begin to draw you in...
:( too little sleep, and way too much work.
10/05/2006
Taking My Stand
I got a haircut today from a very bitchy hair stylist. Boy was he bitchy. I think all hair stylists worship VOLUME, and therefore get extremely offended when you refuse to cut your hair to increase VOLUME! I told him that I kinda like the long-haired Asian girl look. He didn't even crack a smile.
Ah well. I got the haircut I wanted, even though the 25 mintues it took him to do it was excruciating. At least my hair now looks good - long, layered, and super-smooth!
Ah well. I got the haircut I wanted, even though the 25 mintues it took him to do it was excruciating. At least my hair now looks good - long, layered, and super-smooth!
10/04/2006
So-So Day
I missed both of my morning classes today. :( I'm not proud of it, but decided that I cannot pull off another day with only 3-4 hours of sleep. So I slept an astounding 7.5 hours today, and feel pretty refreshed.
However, my reaction paper this week for the political economy workshop -- which was due this afternoon at 4, was not very good, and I am a little upset about that. I thought I had a reasonably good topic, but 3 hours before the deadline, I reviewed the paper that we were supposed to react to, and realized that the topic had already been discussed in the paper, THOROUGHLY. So... I had to scratch much of what I had already written (charts and all!) and tried to bulk up the parts of the reaction paper that could be salvaged... which was not a lot.
Had dinner with ABS at C-House tonight and griped about work, then read in his room for a while. Came back and began reading and preparing for the meeting with Professor M about my pet topic: law and narratives (storytelling). Because of all the RAing and the independent reading, I am now reading more law review articles than ever before. I wish I had started on this earlier, because it is so helpful in giving me research and writing ideas and just in general getting an idea of what legal scholarship is all about.
In other news, I got another callback which will probably fund a nice trip to Chicago during flyout week! This makes it 8 out of 10. Yay.
I should probably go to sleep soon though. Tomorrow, with interviews, 2 classes, and independent reading, will be a LONG day.
However, my reaction paper this week for the political economy workshop -- which was due this afternoon at 4, was not very good, and I am a little upset about that. I thought I had a reasonably good topic, but 3 hours before the deadline, I reviewed the paper that we were supposed to react to, and realized that the topic had already been discussed in the paper, THOROUGHLY. So... I had to scratch much of what I had already written (charts and all!) and tried to bulk up the parts of the reaction paper that could be salvaged... which was not a lot.
Had dinner with ABS at C-House tonight and griped about work, then read in his room for a while. Came back and began reading and preparing for the meeting with Professor M about my pet topic: law and narratives (storytelling). Because of all the RAing and the independent reading, I am now reading more law review articles than ever before. I wish I had started on this earlier, because it is so helpful in giving me research and writing ideas and just in general getting an idea of what legal scholarship is all about.
In other news, I got another callback which will probably fund a nice trip to Chicago during flyout week! This makes it 8 out of 10. Yay.
I should probably go to sleep soon though. Tomorrow, with interviews, 2 classes, and independent reading, will be a LONG day.
10/02/2006
4 more callbacks
My voicemail was loaded with messages today. The London office of a top 30 firm, which i thought did not like me at all, called me back. A top 10 firm and a top 15 firm, both of which I thought I had lackluster interviews with (at least from my perspective), also decided to invite me back. The NY office of the the top 20 firm, for which I already got a callback, also decided to invite me to the DC office.
In the ultimate analysis, I think what must be true is that the firm's standards just aren't that high. They need warm bodies to slave away. Anyone who goes to a top school who is not crazy can probably do it. They are not picky.
So, now I'm a bit overwhelmed and thinking about cutting back on interviews large-scale next week. Probably will delete everything from my list that's not top 7. This should pare down my schedule for a bit
In other news, I'M SO BUSY! Doing more work for Professor H. It's interesting, to the point where it's worth it to sacrifice sleep. Boyfriend is worried, though.
In the ultimate analysis, I think what must be true is that the firm's standards just aren't that high. They need warm bodies to slave away. Anyone who goes to a top school who is not crazy can probably do it. They are not picky.
So, now I'm a bit overwhelmed and thinking about cutting back on interviews large-scale next week. Probably will delete everything from my list that's not top 7. This should pare down my schedule for a bit
In other news, I'M SO BUSY! Doing more work for Professor H. It's interesting, to the point where it's worth it to sacrifice sleep. Boyfriend is worried, though.
10/01/2006
Reflections on OCI, week 1
So... so far I have 3 callbacks, one from a major DC firm's New York office, two from a major NY firm's DC and NY offices. This is 3 callbacks out of the 10 interviews I had last week. How does my ratio stack up against the others? I have no idea.
On our career services website, they say that the typical student accepts 5-7 interviews. This means I need another 3-5 interviews, especially given that I am not sure about the DC firm's New York office. The woman who interviewed me, while very nice, also looked listless and exhausted, which I'm not sure bode well for the overall experience at the firm. But, we'll see.
Overall, I have been singularly unimpressed by the interviewer I have met so far. A few seem like the prototypical law firm jerks: male, white, jock-ish, arrogant. The 2 London offices interviewers seemed utterly distant and uninterested and even vaguely hostile, but that could just be a cultural thing. On the whole, the women interviewers were a lot better, usually warm and friendly, though the younger associate interviewers are almost suspiciously perky. The male partners tended to be older, and more serious, and more formal, and ask a lot harder questions.
What do I think of the whole process? It's not hard, not stressful, especially given that everyone going into it knows that he or she will get a job, and it's just a matter of "which one?" On the other hand, it IS mindnumbing, and time-consuming, and boring. Just the daily trek back and forth from the law school and the downtown hotel where the firms all do their interviews takes 15 minutes each one, so if you have 3 interviews scheduled at different times during the day, that's 1.5 hours walking!
On the way to and from the hotel, we meet other absurdly well-dressed classmates carrying leather portfolios, and give each other a knowing smile. The other students and townspeople must think that we are exceedingly weird, or they are used to the yearly ritual. Some of the hotel guests look bewildered at the number of suited students on each floor, standing right outside of room doors, perusing firm literature or reviewing their resumes. To outsiders, it must be a very comical sight.
----------------------
In other news... lots of work this weekend, as usual. Editing Professor JH's manuscript and looking up cites for him took up most of today, pushing my comparative con law reading completely out of sight. Tonight, Boyfriend, who is in town, and I met up with ABS and his boyfriend C, who is also in town visiting from Chicago. We had Indian food, which was lovely, and then spend 2 hours chatting in this nice little dessert place with yet another couple, JJ and his girlfriend M (visiting from Michigan). All the out of town significant others bonded and had a great time chatting. I arrived home shortly before midnight and still need to put in 1-2 hours of solid work!
On our career services website, they say that the typical student accepts 5-7 interviews. This means I need another 3-5 interviews, especially given that I am not sure about the DC firm's New York office. The woman who interviewed me, while very nice, also looked listless and exhausted, which I'm not sure bode well for the overall experience at the firm. But, we'll see.
Overall, I have been singularly unimpressed by the interviewer I have met so far. A few seem like the prototypical law firm jerks: male, white, jock-ish, arrogant. The 2 London offices interviewers seemed utterly distant and uninterested and even vaguely hostile, but that could just be a cultural thing. On the whole, the women interviewers were a lot better, usually warm and friendly, though the younger associate interviewers are almost suspiciously perky. The male partners tended to be older, and more serious, and more formal, and ask a lot harder questions.
What do I think of the whole process? It's not hard, not stressful, especially given that everyone going into it knows that he or she will get a job, and it's just a matter of "which one?" On the other hand, it IS mindnumbing, and time-consuming, and boring. Just the daily trek back and forth from the law school and the downtown hotel where the firms all do their interviews takes 15 minutes each one, so if you have 3 interviews scheduled at different times during the day, that's 1.5 hours walking!
On the way to and from the hotel, we meet other absurdly well-dressed classmates carrying leather portfolios, and give each other a knowing smile. The other students and townspeople must think that we are exceedingly weird, or they are used to the yearly ritual. Some of the hotel guests look bewildered at the number of suited students on each floor, standing right outside of room doors, perusing firm literature or reviewing their resumes. To outsiders, it must be a very comical sight.
----------------------
In other news... lots of work this weekend, as usual. Editing Professor JH's manuscript and looking up cites for him took up most of today, pushing my comparative con law reading completely out of sight. Tonight, Boyfriend, who is in town, and I met up with ABS and his boyfriend C, who is also in town visiting from Chicago. We had Indian food, which was lovely, and then spend 2 hours chatting in this nice little dessert place with yet another couple, JJ and his girlfriend M (visiting from Michigan). All the out of town significant others bonded and had a great time chatting. I arrived home shortly before midnight and still need to put in 1-2 hours of solid work!
9/27/2006
First Call-Back!
Firms certainly act quickly. I got my first call-back today, from a large top 10 firm that I interviewed with yesterday. I had two very good interviews with two different branches, one with a young perky middle-eastern associate, and another one with an older, more formal, white partner. Both were nice and friendly and seemed to like me. I liked them a lot too, and was hoping that they would call me back. Yay!
Thus far, I have had interviews with six firms in total, and this is the only one that has called me back. I wonder whether other people's ratios are better. One of the advantages of having 28 interviews, of course, is that it's really hard to care about any one of them. Quite a few of my interviewers also seem to have deficient (to say the least) personalities. One of the interviews today never smiled once. He was distant and cold and utterly uninterested, which makes the line "our firm is not as stiff and starchy as the other firms" (delivered in a monotone) really not that believable.
But, the first call-back! Hopefually there are a lot more coming...
Thus far, I have had interviews with six firms in total, and this is the only one that has called me back. I wonder whether other people's ratios are better. One of the advantages of having 28 interviews, of course, is that it's really hard to care about any one of them. Quite a few of my interviewers also seem to have deficient (to say the least) personalities. One of the interviews today never smiled once. He was distant and cold and utterly uninterested, which makes the line "our firm is not as stiff and starchy as the other firms" (delivered in a monotone) really not that believable.
But, the first call-back! Hopefually there are a lot more coming...
9/26/2006
Three Hours of Sleep
What I did today on 3 hours of sleep..
- went to all 3 classes, including the 8:45 comparative con law, and made comments in two.
- wrote a 2-page reaction paper for health care law workshop, arguing, in all seriousness, that even if a legal system is neither accurate nor efficient, it might still need no reform.
- finished 20 pages of reading for local government law.
- went to two firm interviews, and did okay at them.
- only had one meal.
- accepted one research assistantship.
- researched in the library for Professor KM for an hour.
Now I am home, it's 9, and I'm ready to go to bed!
- went to all 3 classes, including the 8:45 comparative con law, and made comments in two.
- wrote a 2-page reaction paper for health care law workshop, arguing, in all seriousness, that even if a legal system is neither accurate nor efficient, it might still need no reform.
- finished 20 pages of reading for local government law.
- went to two firm interviews, and did okay at them.
- only had one meal.
- accepted one research assistantship.
- researched in the library for Professor KM for an hour.
Now I am home, it's 9, and I'm ready to go to bed!
9/24/2006
Thoughts for Myself
Things always look different when I take an ambien. The sleepiness always takes a bit of time to set in, which is fine. But before you become sleepy, you notice other things changing too. For instance, when I look into the mirror, I think I see a slightly different me. The difference is hard to put my finger on, but it has something to do with the strange skin tone - I see to look much darker than I'm used to. My expressions are different too. Usually I'm more alert, but now I am droopy. Certain parts of my face seems to have subtly changed proportions so that the resulting face is still like my original one but just slightly off. I can't explain it, and I'm sure when I sleep it off it will be gone.
After all, I took the ambien to sleep. Sleep has been a rare thing for the past few days. Friday night, when parents came, we chatted, drank, ate, and watched photo slideshows from my Scandinavian trip until after 3. The next morning I got up before 9 (sleeping on the floor really wasn't that comfortable anyway). After they left, I tried to do work, went to the gym, had dinner with ABS and RH and JJ and S in H Square at a great little sushi place. Then went back to ABS's apartment, read some con law, and played his game for the next FIVE hours! I tried researching some firms while he's doing it, but it was hard. Anyway, I didn't come home until 5 AM, but still managed to get up around 11:30.
Did not step out of the apartment today. I read for con law, read for comparative con law, read for my research for Prof.M, then drafted a letter of resigniation for one of the student activities that I took on. Really am not going to have enough time.
Tomorrow is the first week of on campus interview. I'm not really ready, but I will be intereviewing with 4 firms. Yikes. Here I come...
After all, I took the ambien to sleep. Sleep has been a rare thing for the past few days. Friday night, when parents came, we chatted, drank, ate, and watched photo slideshows from my Scandinavian trip until after 3. The next morning I got up before 9 (sleeping on the floor really wasn't that comfortable anyway). After they left, I tried to do work, went to the gym, had dinner with ABS and RH and JJ and S in H Square at a great little sushi place. Then went back to ABS's apartment, read some con law, and played his game for the next FIVE hours! I tried researching some firms while he's doing it, but it was hard. Anyway, I didn't come home until 5 AM, but still managed to get up around 11:30.
Did not step out of the apartment today. I read for con law, read for comparative con law, read for my research for Prof.M, then drafted a letter of resigniation for one of the student activities that I took on. Really am not going to have enough time.
Tomorrow is the first week of on campus interview. I'm not really ready, but I will be intereviewing with 4 firms. Yikes. Here I come...
9/19/2006
Hellish Day
Today was exhausting. Who said that 2L would be easier? It's not. While the classes are not harder, you are about 100X busier, and this stuff piles on right from the start, so you don't have any breathing room at all.
First of all, I hardly slept. Last night I went to sleep at 3 am because of all the readings I had to complete by today (comparative con law prof, you will pay for assigning 70 pages of reading for a single class TWICE in the first two weeks!) Tuesdays this semester are already my worst days anyway. I have 3 classes, from 8:45am until 7 pm. My Law and Political Economy weekly reaction paper is also due this afternoon. And then, add a meeting with the prof I'm researching for, and an organizational meeting late at night, and my whole day is spent with hardly a moment of relaxation.
My meeting with the prof, KM, was filled with delicious awkwardness. KM was late, and when he finally arrived he was sweaty and out of breath. (It's probably one of the last warm days this year, but it was 85 degrees and freakin' hot under the sun). He said hi and I sat down. Silence. Then he said: "So... nice weather, isn't it?" I cringe inside.
I did try to break the ice by asking him about football. He has a newspaper clip of the Steelers winning the Superbowl last year on his office door. "One for the Thumb!" it read. Boyfriend is from Pittsburgh and is a Steeler fan. This made for about 40 second of relatively relaxed conversation.
Then he gave me my assignment. It's kind of interesting. Looking through 3 reels of microfilm of this case during the civil rights era that is famous for its civil procedure ruling, but which is prosecuted by a prominent black lawyer who worked for the NAACP. I have to index the microfilm. Probably should get this started right away, given how busy my next few weeks are going to be, with 27 interview so far and all.
And then, I get my other research assignment, from this young assistant prof JS. A very interesting project, but sadly likely to be humungous as well.
This weekend, parents are visiting, so will have no time to read, study, or research. Next week, I am immediately hit with 12 interviews. AND I kind of want to do upper-level Moot Court competition.
Damn, thinking about all this is making me a bit worried.
Tomorrow: only two classes, thank God. But I am scheduled for the office hours of prof M, with whom I wanted to do an independent reading this semester but who has completely ignored my email up 'til now. I hope I'm not looking for personal humiliation by going to meet her. Crossing my fingers...
:D that I survived the day at all.
:( that next week is going to be like this, all 5 days.
First of all, I hardly slept. Last night I went to sleep at 3 am because of all the readings I had to complete by today (comparative con law prof, you will pay for assigning 70 pages of reading for a single class TWICE in the first two weeks!) Tuesdays this semester are already my worst days anyway. I have 3 classes, from 8:45am until 7 pm. My Law and Political Economy weekly reaction paper is also due this afternoon. And then, add a meeting with the prof I'm researching for, and an organizational meeting late at night, and my whole day is spent with hardly a moment of relaxation.
My meeting with the prof, KM, was filled with delicious awkwardness. KM was late, and when he finally arrived he was sweaty and out of breath. (It's probably one of the last warm days this year, but it was 85 degrees and freakin' hot under the sun). He said hi and I sat down. Silence. Then he said: "So... nice weather, isn't it?" I cringe inside.
I did try to break the ice by asking him about football. He has a newspaper clip of the Steelers winning the Superbowl last year on his office door. "One for the Thumb!" it read. Boyfriend is from Pittsburgh and is a Steeler fan. This made for about 40 second of relatively relaxed conversation.
Then he gave me my assignment. It's kind of interesting. Looking through 3 reels of microfilm of this case during the civil rights era that is famous for its civil procedure ruling, but which is prosecuted by a prominent black lawyer who worked for the NAACP. I have to index the microfilm. Probably should get this started right away, given how busy my next few weeks are going to be, with 27 interview so far and all.
And then, I get my other research assignment, from this young assistant prof JS. A very interesting project, but sadly likely to be humungous as well.
This weekend, parents are visiting, so will have no time to read, study, or research. Next week, I am immediately hit with 12 interviews. AND I kind of want to do upper-level Moot Court competition.
Damn, thinking about all this is making me a bit worried.
Tomorrow: only two classes, thank God. But I am scheduled for the office hours of prof M, with whom I wanted to do an independent reading this semester but who has completely ignored my email up 'til now. I hope I'm not looking for personal humiliation by going to meet her. Crossing my fingers...
:D that I survived the day at all.
:( that next week is going to be like this, all 5 days.
9/18/2006
I'm Back!
I know, I know, I have been totally MIA. Between adjusting to classes, a gazillion organizational meetings, and hanging out with ABS, J, and Boyfriend, every day just somehow seems to slip away without me putting a word down. I do feel guilty. So here I am back again.
Well, I'm a 2L now... how do I feel?
I feel fine, and a lot more relaxed than 1Ls. I remember last year around this time, when classes were just getting started. There was so much uncertainty and anxiety about classes and classmates and meeting people and "doing the right things." Now, I'm just a lot more relaxed about everything. I am not jaded. In fact I am very excited about the courses I'm taking this semester. Thank God we don't have those mandatory 1L classes and can instead take what interests us! In my case, this includes a lot of policy and comparative law courses. For J, it means copyright, secured transaction, and human rights stuff. For many others, it means trial advocacy courses where they spend 7 (!) hours a day learning about how to be a "real" lawyer. I really want to do that next semester too.
In terms of extracurriculars, upon reflection, I realized that I didn't really enjoy either of my two "main" activities last year, and therefore I am jettisoning both of them! Yay! Nothing wrong with them. In fact I know a ton of people in both orgs who really love the activities, but for whatever reason they just didn't click with me. Instead, I am trying out a couple of other campus activities. One is a relatively newly formed liberal organization (formed explicitly to counter the very influential conservative studetn organization on campus) that brings in speakers and discusses public policy. They are launching a new journal this year, and I volunteered to be an articles editor, and just got assigned to an article on constitutional law last week. It's a bit scary since I am only just now taking con law, but no matter!
I am also a nonresidential law tutor for one of the undergraduate dormitories here, where ABS is a residential tutor and in fact hooked me up with the sweet job. I get 5 free meals a week at the house in exchange for doling out advice and general support about law school. So far, I have met one of my advisees (I have a total of two) and he seems nice, if a bit lost about the whole law school application process. I have also just been hanging out a lot with ABS and his cat in his nice suite in the dorms (which is a convenient 7-minute walk from my apartment).
Oh, I am also researching for a professor here who is an expert in legal history. He seems nice, and the work seems light... we will see how that goes.
So, this is how I spend my days. My life is still in a bt of flux right now, especially since today our career services office posted the interview schedules for Fall On-Campus Interview. I bid for a total of 37 firms (mainly because I didn't know too much about them and just kind of went down the rankings... I know, it's the worst way of doing these things.) In any case, I now have 25 interviews scheduled over the next 3 weeks. Yikes!
:D beautiful summer weather today. Cute con law prof!
:( 70 pages of reading for comparative con law for tomorrow's class.
Well, I'm a 2L now... how do I feel?
I feel fine, and a lot more relaxed than 1Ls. I remember last year around this time, when classes were just getting started. There was so much uncertainty and anxiety about classes and classmates and meeting people and "doing the right things." Now, I'm just a lot more relaxed about everything. I am not jaded. In fact I am very excited about the courses I'm taking this semester. Thank God we don't have those mandatory 1L classes and can instead take what interests us! In my case, this includes a lot of policy and comparative law courses. For J, it means copyright, secured transaction, and human rights stuff. For many others, it means trial advocacy courses where they spend 7 (!) hours a day learning about how to be a "real" lawyer. I really want to do that next semester too.
In terms of extracurriculars, upon reflection, I realized that I didn't really enjoy either of my two "main" activities last year, and therefore I am jettisoning both of them! Yay! Nothing wrong with them. In fact I know a ton of people in both orgs who really love the activities, but for whatever reason they just didn't click with me. Instead, I am trying out a couple of other campus activities. One is a relatively newly formed liberal organization (formed explicitly to counter the very influential conservative studetn organization on campus) that brings in speakers and discusses public policy. They are launching a new journal this year, and I volunteered to be an articles editor, and just got assigned to an article on constitutional law last week. It's a bit scary since I am only just now taking con law, but no matter!
I am also a nonresidential law tutor for one of the undergraduate dormitories here, where ABS is a residential tutor and in fact hooked me up with the sweet job. I get 5 free meals a week at the house in exchange for doling out advice and general support about law school. So far, I have met one of my advisees (I have a total of two) and he seems nice, if a bit lost about the whole law school application process. I have also just been hanging out a lot with ABS and his cat in his nice suite in the dorms (which is a convenient 7-minute walk from my apartment).
Oh, I am also researching for a professor here who is an expert in legal history. He seems nice, and the work seems light... we will see how that goes.
So, this is how I spend my days. My life is still in a bt of flux right now, especially since today our career services office posted the interview schedules for Fall On-Campus Interview. I bid for a total of 37 firms (mainly because I didn't know too much about them and just kind of went down the rankings... I know, it's the worst way of doing these things.) In any case, I now have 25 interviews scheduled over the next 3 weeks. Yikes!
:D beautiful summer weather today. Cute con law prof!
:( 70 pages of reading for comparative con law for tomorrow's class.
9/12/2006
Course Schedules
The past few days have been INSANE! Aside from a big project that I need to do for a student business venture that I'm involved in, I also had to decide on my courses. Add/drop period for courses ends tonight at midnight! After going to approximately 4-5 classes per day, I have finalized the classes - finally!
1. Con Law
2. Comparative Con Law
3. Comparative Local Government: Seminar
4. Political Economy Seminar
5. Health Law Policy Seminar
All 3 of the seminars will involve reading and writing original work. I'm tres excited!
What's more, my Friday is entirely FREE! yoohoo.
1. Con Law
2. Comparative Con Law
3. Comparative Local Government: Seminar
4. Political Economy Seminar
5. Health Law Policy Seminar
All 3 of the seminars will involve reading and writing original work. I'm tres excited!
What's more, my Friday is entirely FREE! yoohoo.
9/07/2006
So Much To Do!
My "to-do" list:
- write to professors and seeing whether they wanted to supervise independent reading with me.
- update resume, research firms and sign up for fall On-Campus Interviews.
- decide on my courses before add/drop period ends.
- fulfill my various extracurricular commitments, including a very time-consuming task that needs to be done by this weekend (too tedious to really explain here - take my word for it that I do NOT look forward to it!)
- inquire into various fellowships, honors programs, and awards, the due dates for which are all in a few weeks!
- organize my apartment, do laundary, dry clean my clothes, buy books, and get ready for the new semester!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
- write to professors and seeing whether they wanted to supervise independent reading with me.
- update resume, research firms and sign up for fall On-Campus Interviews.
- decide on my courses before add/drop period ends.
- fulfill my various extracurricular commitments, including a very time-consuming task that needs to be done by this weekend (too tedious to really explain here - take my word for it that I do NOT look forward to it!)
- inquire into various fellowships, honors programs, and awards, the due dates for which are all in a few weeks!
- organize my apartment, do laundary, dry clean my clothes, buy books, and get ready for the new semester!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
9/06/2006
New Semester!
I am back in C-Town. Got back to the States late last night, and spent the entire morning packing and then driving back to the C-Town apartment. Then spent 4 hours vacuuming, disinfecting, and wiping down the entire apartment. Then carried all my stuff in from the car, and piled them on the floor, where they still are.
Too tired to really unpack, and tomorrow is going to be a full day of running around doing errands. I apparently owe my law school $8,000, so have to cough up the cash somehow. (Hello, high-interest loan!)
It's now almost 5 a.m. in Norway. Sigh...
Observation of the day: brown-rice sushi, while an intriguing concept, is really not that good. Actually, they are kind of awful.
Too tired to really unpack, and tomorrow is going to be a full day of running around doing errands. I apparently owe my law school $8,000, so have to cough up the cash somehow. (Hello, high-interest loan!)
It's now almost 5 a.m. in Norway. Sigh...
Observation of the day: brown-rice sushi, while an intriguing concept, is really not that good. Actually, they are kind of awful.
8/31/2006
Bergen photos
I've talked a lot about how beautiful Bergen is without posting a photo. Here are four that I took just yesterday evening walking around the city.
8/30/2006
Another Day in Bergen
I love the hotel we are staying at. All the hotels in Scandinavia has been very good - clean, spacious, and functional. A bit on the expensive side, to be sure. All the double rooms that Boyfriend and I found have been at least $80, and in Copenhagen, the room cost $100 per night. But I had expected that before I came. After all, Scandinavia is famous for its expensiveness.
What I love in particular about the hotel in Bergen, though, are two things: its location, and the fact that it has free Internet. The second reason is why I've been able to post more often in the past few days. :D The hotel, called CityBox, is a budget hotel right in the heart of the city, 3 blocks from the train station, 2 blocks from the university, with lots of cheap and cool-looking student bars, pizzerias, grocery stores, and restaurants.
Boyfriend and I spent the whole day exploring different neighborhoods in Bergen. We decided that if there's any city we have visited so far so far that we would definitely want to live in, Bergen is it. The entire city of Bergen is built on the mountain side, overlooking the ocean, islands, and fjords. As a result, there are several harbors teeming with boats, many stretches of beautiful beach-front neighborhoods, as well as gorgeous houses built on steep slopes of the mountain and streets made entirely of stairs (reminds me a bit of San Francisco).
There are also beautiful little parks nestled in the center of the city, spectacular water fountains, random statues, and the obligatory cobbled-stoned streets in the town center that every single European city is required to have, of course. In short, walking around town, every few minutes you seem to be in a completely different neighborhood. I think I would never get bored in Bergen.
Boyfriend and I have decided to stay for at least one more day in Bergen. We simply cannot leave this beautiful town behind.
What I love in particular about the hotel in Bergen, though, are two things: its location, and the fact that it has free Internet. The second reason is why I've been able to post more often in the past few days. :D The hotel, called CityBox, is a budget hotel right in the heart of the city, 3 blocks from the train station, 2 blocks from the university, with lots of cheap and cool-looking student bars, pizzerias, grocery stores, and restaurants.
Boyfriend and I spent the whole day exploring different neighborhoods in Bergen. We decided that if there's any city we have visited so far so far that we would definitely want to live in, Bergen is it. The entire city of Bergen is built on the mountain side, overlooking the ocean, islands, and fjords. As a result, there are several harbors teeming with boats, many stretches of beautiful beach-front neighborhoods, as well as gorgeous houses built on steep slopes of the mountain and streets made entirely of stairs (reminds me a bit of San Francisco).
There are also beautiful little parks nestled in the center of the city, spectacular water fountains, random statues, and the obligatory cobbled-stoned streets in the town center that every single European city is required to have, of course. In short, walking around town, every few minutes you seem to be in a completely different neighborhood. I think I would never get bored in Bergen.
Boyfriend and I have decided to stay for at least one more day in Bergen. We simply cannot leave this beautiful town behind.
8/29/2006
Norway
13 days, 3 countries later, I am writing from Bergen, Norway, a stunningly beautiful city by the Sognefjord.
Boyfriend and I took an overnight cruise from Copenhagen to Oslo, then immediately jumped on the 7 hour train ride from Oslo all the way to the western Norwegian city of Bergen.
The train ride has been called "the most beautiful train ride in the world". We were literally riding in the mountains, so high up that trees don't even grow anymore, passed by the highest train station in the world, and saw all through the way, crystalline lakes and streams tucked in between cliffs and peaks, white glistening glaciers, and miles and miles of virgin pine forest.
Bergen is a colorful little city on the western coast, with a bustling town center (with the obligatory cobble-stoned streets, of course), beautiful row of houses by the water, a busy harbor, and lots and lots of nice cafes and historical buildings.
Norway is much more rugged than the other 3 countries. So far, Copenhagen has been the most cosmopolitan of all the cities, with a ton of fantastic museums, castles, palaces, and galleries. Finland has been the most exotic, because it seems very Eastern European to me. Everyone we saw there has been very Slavic-looking. Sweden has been most... Scandinavian, or what is commonly imagined to be Scandinavian -- clean, polished, with blonde and beautiful people walking around. And now, Norway, which seems to be just pristine and unspoiled nature, and a little bit of culture carved out of the nature.
I'm really looking forward to exploring Bergen tomorrow.
Boyfriend and I took an overnight cruise from Copenhagen to Oslo, then immediately jumped on the 7 hour train ride from Oslo all the way to the western Norwegian city of Bergen.
The train ride has been called "the most beautiful train ride in the world". We were literally riding in the mountains, so high up that trees don't even grow anymore, passed by the highest train station in the world, and saw all through the way, crystalline lakes and streams tucked in between cliffs and peaks, white glistening glaciers, and miles and miles of virgin pine forest.
Bergen is a colorful little city on the western coast, with a bustling town center (with the obligatory cobble-stoned streets, of course), beautiful row of houses by the water, a busy harbor, and lots and lots of nice cafes and historical buildings.
Norway is much more rugged than the other 3 countries. So far, Copenhagen has been the most cosmopolitan of all the cities, with a ton of fantastic museums, castles, palaces, and galleries. Finland has been the most exotic, because it seems very Eastern European to me. Everyone we saw there has been very Slavic-looking. Sweden has been most... Scandinavian, or what is commonly imagined to be Scandinavian -- clean, polished, with blonde and beautiful people walking around. And now, Norway, which seems to be just pristine and unspoiled nature, and a little bit of culture carved out of the nature.
I'm really looking forward to exploring Bergen tomorrow.
8/26/2006
Nostalgia for an Imaginary Fatherland
I am writing from Copenhagen, after nearly a week in Sweden and a brief day in Helsinki. Both were lovely, but I must say that so far, Copenhagen is my favorite.
It's the most diverse of all the Scandinavian cities. People are not just thin and white and blonde hair. Walking on the street, you see people of all skin colors, looking perfectly at home. The natives look much more middle European.
More like... Germans.
And Danish sounds like German. On the train from Malmo to Copenhagen, I thought I could almost understand the conductor. All around the train station, I see familiar traces of the language that I once was fluent in. And then, lying in my hotel bed, I turned on the TV and four of the stations were German. I could watch ZDF and ARD and SAT-1, all the familiar stations that helped me while away the long winter nights in Potsdam.
And that's when it hit me: I have been missing Germany. I have been away for four years. And I miss it.
Away. A funny word to use, but one that I chose instinctively. My nostalgia for Germany is not like missing a country that I have visited and liked. Strangely, it is like missing a country that I count as one of my homes. I have only visisted a dozen times, lived there for 10 months. And yet... even before I have visited the country, I have longed for it and almost loved it.
Is it because of Beethoven and Bach adn Goethe and Wittgenstein? Perhaps Germany is the closest thing I have to a spiritual homeland. I remember reading an essay once, where it said that "I have been missing Paris even before I visited." This is how I feel and have always felt about Germany. Visiting Israel was a very spiritual experience for me, but visiting Germany, for me, was even more so. I remember the first day I was off the plane - my uncle drove me from Zurich to Konstanz. And as soon as we entered the border, I remember saying to myself, thinking: I am in Germany. I really am in Germany!
And sitting here, in Copenhagen, this most German of all Scandinavian cities, I am realizing that I want to go back to Germany. I have been away for four years, and now I'm finally at its doorstep again. Many of the tourists here are German, and sitting on the bus, I hang on to their conversation hungrily, trying to remember and to understand.
All the while, I feel enveloped by nostalgia -- for that year I spent in Potsdam, but more for an imaginary land that I have always wanted to call home.
It's the most diverse of all the Scandinavian cities. People are not just thin and white and blonde hair. Walking on the street, you see people of all skin colors, looking perfectly at home. The natives look much more middle European.
More like... Germans.
And Danish sounds like German. On the train from Malmo to Copenhagen, I thought I could almost understand the conductor. All around the train station, I see familiar traces of the language that I once was fluent in. And then, lying in my hotel bed, I turned on the TV and four of the stations were German. I could watch ZDF and ARD and SAT-1, all the familiar stations that helped me while away the long winter nights in Potsdam.
And that's when it hit me: I have been missing Germany. I have been away for four years. And I miss it.
Away. A funny word to use, but one that I chose instinctively. My nostalgia for Germany is not like missing a country that I have visited and liked. Strangely, it is like missing a country that I count as one of my homes. I have only visisted a dozen times, lived there for 10 months. And yet... even before I have visited the country, I have longed for it and almost loved it.
Is it because of Beethoven and Bach adn Goethe and Wittgenstein? Perhaps Germany is the closest thing I have to a spiritual homeland. I remember reading an essay once, where it said that "I have been missing Paris even before I visited." This is how I feel and have always felt about Germany. Visiting Israel was a very spiritual experience for me, but visiting Germany, for me, was even more so. I remember the first day I was off the plane - my uncle drove me from Zurich to Konstanz. And as soon as we entered the border, I remember saying to myself, thinking: I am in Germany. I really am in Germany!
And sitting here, in Copenhagen, this most German of all Scandinavian cities, I am realizing that I want to go back to Germany. I have been away for four years, and now I'm finally at its doorstep again. Many of the tourists here are German, and sitting on the bus, I hang on to their conversation hungrily, trying to remember and to understand.
All the while, I feel enveloped by nostalgia -- for that year I spent in Potsdam, but more for an imaginary land that I have always wanted to call home.
8/21/2006
Stockholm photos
Boyfriend and I finally got our luggage today, the night before we check out of our hotel! Yay!
To celebrate, here are a bunch of photos I took over the past few days in Stockholm. Enjoy!
Old Town Gamla Stan, in the crisp early morning light.
Pretty building facade in Gamla Stan.
Pretty alley in Gamla Stan.
One of the many bridges of Stockholm. The city is build on many islands, so there is water everywhere.
Ha!
Mmmmmm... I've missed European bakeries...
Cute Swedish guard guarding the royal palace...
... And a cute tourist taking a photo of him.
Another view of the city.
By the Royal Palace.
Tourists gathering to see the changing of the guards in front of the Palace.
One of the rooms in the palace. Bleh.
Beautiful and stylish Swedish children.
The Swedes have an obsession with their royalties too! These are postcards being sold at the palace gift shop.
Central square in Gamla Stan.
Costumed tour guides in the square, posing for tourists...
...And flirting with a pretty passer-by. :)
Obessive-compulsively square trees in front of the Parliament
Girl making ice cream cones in the shop window.
Swedish glass, which is apparently a famed specialty in the region, or so claim the gift shops...
Hot air ballons rising in the dusk from the city center.
Random and picturesque square.
Folk dancers dressed in costumes in front of the Nordic Museum.
The imposing architecture of the Nordic Museum. The exhibits though were bleh.
Another view of the city, from Katrinahissen, a high point in the city.
A cruise to Helsinki sailing out to the sea. Boyfriend and I will be on one of those tomorrow.
Sunset in Stockholm.
To celebrate, here are a bunch of photos I took over the past few days in Stockholm. Enjoy!
Old Town Gamla Stan, in the crisp early morning light.
Pretty building facade in Gamla Stan.
Pretty alley in Gamla Stan.
One of the many bridges of Stockholm. The city is build on many islands, so there is water everywhere.
Ha!
Mmmmmm... I've missed European bakeries...
Cute Swedish guard guarding the royal palace...
... And a cute tourist taking a photo of him.
Another view of the city.
By the Royal Palace.
Tourists gathering to see the changing of the guards in front of the Palace.
One of the rooms in the palace. Bleh.
Beautiful and stylish Swedish children.
The Swedes have an obsession with their royalties too! These are postcards being sold at the palace gift shop.
Central square in Gamla Stan.
Costumed tour guides in the square, posing for tourists...
...And flirting with a pretty passer-by. :)
Obessive-compulsively square trees in front of the Parliament
Girl making ice cream cones in the shop window.
Swedish glass, which is apparently a famed specialty in the region, or so claim the gift shops...
Hot air ballons rising in the dusk from the city center.
Random and picturesque square.
Folk dancers dressed in costumes in front of the Nordic Museum.
The imposing architecture of the Nordic Museum. The exhibits though were bleh.
Another view of the city, from Katrinahissen, a high point in the city.
A cruise to Helsinki sailing out to the sea. Boyfriend and I will be on one of those tomorrow.
Sunset in Stockholm.
8/20/2006
Scandinavian Diaries, Day 1 - 4
Here are a summary of my four days so far in Scandinavia. Pictures hopefully soon to follow.
Day 1 (Thursday):
We get to Stockholm at 11:30 am local time. Arlanda airport is immaculately beautiful – modern, bright, airy, clean, and the exact opposite from the cramped, ugly, and creakyAmerican Airlines international terminal in JFK. After an extremely hectic time in Heathrow (thanks for nothing, f’ing terrorists!), we were very grateful to arrive at a place where everything seems orderly and under control.
Upon arrival, however, Boyfriend and I discovered with dismay that our luggages did not arrive. The British Airway agent did not seem at all surprised, and very perfunctorily took down our information and said that BA would reimburse each of us up to 50 pounds for our expenses replacing the necessary toiletries for the next few days. He said that our luggage would probably be delivered later in the day or during the night.
With some difficulty, we find our way from the airport to our hotel. Swedish is very similar to German, which ended up helping enormously because I was able to vaguely understand that the subway that was supposed to take us to our hotel was under renovation and that we had to take a bus transfer instead. We finally get to the hotel around 3:30 or so. Our room is a small, cutterbox-type basic room at a hotel that we found at approximately $70/day – a real find for Scandinavia! – a ways outside the city. Boyfriend and I collapsed immediately upon arrival. I remember lying in the bed and literally not being able to move a muscle. Then I fell into a deep sleep.
We wake up at dusk, around 8 or so, and struggle out of bed and decide to go to the local supermarket, which turned out to be about a 20 minute walk away. The scenery on the way – trees and square and functional apartment buildings, remind me of East Germany, or Israel. Only one lone supermarket was open in the shopping center district. We stocked up on toiletries, yogurts, fruits, and veggies, then carried our purchase back in our backpacks and walked back to the hotel just before darkness fell. We had dinner in the hotel garden and went back to sleep around 10:30 pm.
High point: the airport
Low point: the lack of our luggage.
Day 2 (Friday)
I woke up around 2:30 am and couldn’t get back to sleep. To pass the time, I read Bill Bryson’s essays “Neither Here Nor There,” which is an account of his travels in Europe, starting in Norway, no less. It’s very funny. Boyfriend, who is a much better sleeper than I am, wakes up around 5:30, and we make our way out of the hotel around 7:30. Our luggage, sadly, has not arrived.
We take the bus/metro (which is called the T-Bana here in Swedish) into town. We get out at Gamla Stan, the Stockholm old town, and walk around. Gamla Stan is the classic European center city, with narrow cobble-stoned streets, colorful old houses, touristy shops, town squares, and outdoor cafes. Because it was early, nothing was open yet, so we had the whole quite winding paths to ourselves.
Stockholm is a city built on small islands, and some guidebooks have called it more watery than Venice. Walk in any direction for a few minutes and you’ll likely come upon a harbor, a canal, or a lake. In the early morning sunlight, the entire city was glistening with water and sunlight. The facades of grand old buildings by the water were beautiful and imposing. The view was quite stunning.
Boyfriend, who is still wearing his sweatpants that he wore to the airplane, needs a pair of regular pants urgently. So we found our way to the more commercial parts of the city, the equivalent of 5th Avenue in New York, where hundreds of glitzy, affluent boutiques and department stores opened their doors wide to tourists and shopaholics of all nationalities. We dive into the stores and shop shop shop. I got some urgently needed face lotion and lipstick (my own extensive collection is sadly inaccessible in my lost luggage). Boyfriend got himself a pair of pants.
In case you are wondering, Swedish people are indeed breathtakingly beautiful. Every other person walking down the sidewalk is so gorgeous he/she could be a model. They are tall and trim and blond and tan and glowing with wholesomeness. Never in my life have I felt so short and plain. The men have chiseled faces, and wear narrow pants and expensively cut sweaters or suits. The women are tall, stylish, wide-set eyes, almost whitish blond hair, golden skin, impossibly thin, their almost endless tan legs ending in a pair of understated ballerina flats. Random people are more gorgeous than movie starlets in the United States – the bank attendant, the ticket counter lady, the salesgirl, the ice cream vendor, even the bus driver (a blonde with large, liquid eyes). It’s almost ridiculous. There are women with darker complexions here too, some of them probably southern European immigrants, and they too are often very beautiful. Perhaps the city brings it out in people. Very few people are overweight here.
So, after the shopping, Boyfriend and I sat in the café section of NK, a large and ritzy department store here, and had an excellent shrimp and cottage cheese salad and coffee. After that, my sleeplessness caught up with me, so I went back to the hotel to sleep while Boyfriend wandered around more and met up with his cousin who lives in Stockholm for dinner. I myself napped until after 7, then caught the bus and wandered around in Gamla Stan a bit more. The canals and the old city looked very romantic in the evening, and the streets were filled with pedestrians and street artists. Around 10:30 it got chilly, and I decided to go home.
High point: Evening stroll by the canal.
Low point: having no matching shoes except for my blindingly white sneakers to wear all day long. I miss my luggage!
Day 3 (Saturday)
Still no sign of any luggage.
Once again I got up around 2:30 am and could not fall back asleep, so read my guidebook and the New Yorkers that I brought with me on the trip as reading material.
Weather-wise, the day was as perfect as the previous few days. It is sunny and dry and not too warm but also not too cool. No air-conditioning needed in our hotel room (and there was none). Perfect days to walk outside, which is what Boyfriend and I did for much of today. We walked around in the city center and had coffee and breakfast at a large gourmet market place that we discovered by accident. The food was fresh and delicious (couscous salad, tomatoes, fresh shrimp, broiled beef, plums, and beef teriyaki kebab), though certainly not cheap. Afterwards, a very full Boyfriend and I went across the street to Sweden House to buy a 48-hour Stockholm Card, which entitled us to enter more than 47 museums and use all of the city’s transportation system for no additional cost. We than attacked the city’s museums and attractions like there’s no tomorrow.
First place we went was the royal palace, right outside of Gamla Stan. It’s no Versaille, but there were quite a few rooms to walk through in the royal apartments section, and interesting nonetheless. There were a few interesting exhibits, both within the Royal Palace itself and nearby in the Royal Armory and art museums. We also witnessed an initially interesting but increasingly endless “changing of the guards” ceremony that takes place every day at noon. A lot of loud military music, shouting of orders, and men in military uniforms involved.
Boyfriend and I went to a few other museums after that, and contemplated taking the ferry, but ended up not to and just walked round and round the city, exploring several neighborhoods and neighboring islands. Before this trip, I got a pedometer from this trendy little store, and according to it, we walked more than 30,000 steps yesterday. Not bad.
High point: the royal palace. But the discovery of the gourmet food hall was wonderful as well. We will definitely be back for more.
Low point: Boyfriend losing his Stockholm Card, upsetting me and prompting a serious discussion about his carelessness while sitting on the bank of the island.
Day 4 (Sunday)
I woke up dutifully again around 2:30am, but this time was able to fall asleep again at 4:00 for a couple of hours. Had a lot of weird dreams about law school people.
Boyfriend and I had a leisurely morning and didn’t leave the hotel until after 9, the latest we’ve left yet. We spend some time in the central train station reserving train rides to Copenhagen next week, then debated how to spend our Monday – whether to go to a nearby small town named Uppsala, or to take a ferry to one of the 24,000 small archipelagos surrounding Stockholm and hike. In the end, we decided that Stockholm is way too pleasant and interesting for us to leave and that we should stick around instead. Also, in case we don’t see our luggage again, there’s some shopping that we need to do!
Boyfriend got another Stockholm Card, and we found our way to another of Stockholm’s central islands where there the Nordic Museum, the famous Vasa Museum and a big open air folk museum named Skansen. The Nordic Museum is beautiful, but the exhibits are kind of blah. The Vasa Museum, which features an entire sunken ship from the 17th century that was lifted out of the water and restored, is the coolest thing I have seen so far on this trip. Boyfriend and I spent hours in the museum poring over everything, and just marveling at the size and the beauty of the ship.
We then walked around the park grounds – the entire island consists of a large botanical garden and lovely views of the center city and lots of nice picnicking spots. We ended up eating our food at one of these spots, then strolled along the canals looking at the boats gliding by, the
We are now sitting at one of the cafes in the city that has free Internet access. This evening, we plan to take a cable car lift to the top of a cliff to see Stockholm from a high point.
High point: hands down, the Vasa Museum.
Low point: Learning that I hate, hate, hate herring. Ugh.
Day 1 (Thursday):
We get to Stockholm at 11:30 am local time. Arlanda airport is immaculately beautiful – modern, bright, airy, clean, and the exact opposite from the cramped, ugly, and creakyAmerican Airlines international terminal in JFK. After an extremely hectic time in Heathrow (thanks for nothing, f’ing terrorists!), we were very grateful to arrive at a place where everything seems orderly and under control.
Upon arrival, however, Boyfriend and I discovered with dismay that our luggages did not arrive. The British Airway agent did not seem at all surprised, and very perfunctorily took down our information and said that BA would reimburse each of us up to 50 pounds for our expenses replacing the necessary toiletries for the next few days. He said that our luggage would probably be delivered later in the day or during the night.
With some difficulty, we find our way from the airport to our hotel. Swedish is very similar to German, which ended up helping enormously because I was able to vaguely understand that the subway that was supposed to take us to our hotel was under renovation and that we had to take a bus transfer instead. We finally get to the hotel around 3:30 or so. Our room is a small, cutterbox-type basic room at a hotel that we found at approximately $70/day – a real find for Scandinavia! – a ways outside the city. Boyfriend and I collapsed immediately upon arrival. I remember lying in the bed and literally not being able to move a muscle. Then I fell into a deep sleep.
We wake up at dusk, around 8 or so, and struggle out of bed and decide to go to the local supermarket, which turned out to be about a 20 minute walk away. The scenery on the way – trees and square and functional apartment buildings, remind me of East Germany, or Israel. Only one lone supermarket was open in the shopping center district. We stocked up on toiletries, yogurts, fruits, and veggies, then carried our purchase back in our backpacks and walked back to the hotel just before darkness fell. We had dinner in the hotel garden and went back to sleep around 10:30 pm.
High point: the airport
Low point: the lack of our luggage.
Day 2 (Friday)
I woke up around 2:30 am and couldn’t get back to sleep. To pass the time, I read Bill Bryson’s essays “Neither Here Nor There,” which is an account of his travels in Europe, starting in Norway, no less. It’s very funny. Boyfriend, who is a much better sleeper than I am, wakes up around 5:30, and we make our way out of the hotel around 7:30. Our luggage, sadly, has not arrived.
We take the bus/metro (which is called the T-Bana here in Swedish) into town. We get out at Gamla Stan, the Stockholm old town, and walk around. Gamla Stan is the classic European center city, with narrow cobble-stoned streets, colorful old houses, touristy shops, town squares, and outdoor cafes. Because it was early, nothing was open yet, so we had the whole quite winding paths to ourselves.
Stockholm is a city built on small islands, and some guidebooks have called it more watery than Venice. Walk in any direction for a few minutes and you’ll likely come upon a harbor, a canal, or a lake. In the early morning sunlight, the entire city was glistening with water and sunlight. The facades of grand old buildings by the water were beautiful and imposing. The view was quite stunning.
Boyfriend, who is still wearing his sweatpants that he wore to the airplane, needs a pair of regular pants urgently. So we found our way to the more commercial parts of the city, the equivalent of 5th Avenue in New York, where hundreds of glitzy, affluent boutiques and department stores opened their doors wide to tourists and shopaholics of all nationalities. We dive into the stores and shop shop shop. I got some urgently needed face lotion and lipstick (my own extensive collection is sadly inaccessible in my lost luggage). Boyfriend got himself a pair of pants.
In case you are wondering, Swedish people are indeed breathtakingly beautiful. Every other person walking down the sidewalk is so gorgeous he/she could be a model. They are tall and trim and blond and tan and glowing with wholesomeness. Never in my life have I felt so short and plain. The men have chiseled faces, and wear narrow pants and expensively cut sweaters or suits. The women are tall, stylish, wide-set eyes, almost whitish blond hair, golden skin, impossibly thin, their almost endless tan legs ending in a pair of understated ballerina flats. Random people are more gorgeous than movie starlets in the United States – the bank attendant, the ticket counter lady, the salesgirl, the ice cream vendor, even the bus driver (a blonde with large, liquid eyes). It’s almost ridiculous. There are women with darker complexions here too, some of them probably southern European immigrants, and they too are often very beautiful. Perhaps the city brings it out in people. Very few people are overweight here.
So, after the shopping, Boyfriend and I sat in the café section of NK, a large and ritzy department store here, and had an excellent shrimp and cottage cheese salad and coffee. After that, my sleeplessness caught up with me, so I went back to the hotel to sleep while Boyfriend wandered around more and met up with his cousin who lives in Stockholm for dinner. I myself napped until after 7, then caught the bus and wandered around in Gamla Stan a bit more. The canals and the old city looked very romantic in the evening, and the streets were filled with pedestrians and street artists. Around 10:30 it got chilly, and I decided to go home.
High point: Evening stroll by the canal.
Low point: having no matching shoes except for my blindingly white sneakers to wear all day long. I miss my luggage!
Day 3 (Saturday)
Still no sign of any luggage.
Once again I got up around 2:30 am and could not fall back asleep, so read my guidebook and the New Yorkers that I brought with me on the trip as reading material.
Weather-wise, the day was as perfect as the previous few days. It is sunny and dry and not too warm but also not too cool. No air-conditioning needed in our hotel room (and there was none). Perfect days to walk outside, which is what Boyfriend and I did for much of today. We walked around in the city center and had coffee and breakfast at a large gourmet market place that we discovered by accident. The food was fresh and delicious (couscous salad, tomatoes, fresh shrimp, broiled beef, plums, and beef teriyaki kebab), though certainly not cheap. Afterwards, a very full Boyfriend and I went across the street to Sweden House to buy a 48-hour Stockholm Card, which entitled us to enter more than 47 museums and use all of the city’s transportation system for no additional cost. We than attacked the city’s museums and attractions like there’s no tomorrow.
First place we went was the royal palace, right outside of Gamla Stan. It’s no Versaille, but there were quite a few rooms to walk through in the royal apartments section, and interesting nonetheless. There were a few interesting exhibits, both within the Royal Palace itself and nearby in the Royal Armory and art museums. We also witnessed an initially interesting but increasingly endless “changing of the guards” ceremony that takes place every day at noon. A lot of loud military music, shouting of orders, and men in military uniforms involved.
Boyfriend and I went to a few other museums after that, and contemplated taking the ferry, but ended up not to and just walked round and round the city, exploring several neighborhoods and neighboring islands. Before this trip, I got a pedometer from this trendy little store, and according to it, we walked more than 30,000 steps yesterday. Not bad.
High point: the royal palace. But the discovery of the gourmet food hall was wonderful as well. We will definitely be back for more.
Low point: Boyfriend losing his Stockholm Card, upsetting me and prompting a serious discussion about his carelessness while sitting on the bank of the island.
Day 4 (Sunday)
I woke up dutifully again around 2:30am, but this time was able to fall asleep again at 4:00 for a couple of hours. Had a lot of weird dreams about law school people.
Boyfriend and I had a leisurely morning and didn’t leave the hotel until after 9, the latest we’ve left yet. We spend some time in the central train station reserving train rides to Copenhagen next week, then debated how to spend our Monday – whether to go to a nearby small town named Uppsala, or to take a ferry to one of the 24,000 small archipelagos surrounding Stockholm and hike. In the end, we decided that Stockholm is way too pleasant and interesting for us to leave and that we should stick around instead. Also, in case we don’t see our luggage again, there’s some shopping that we need to do!
Boyfriend got another Stockholm Card, and we found our way to another of Stockholm’s central islands where there the Nordic Museum, the famous Vasa Museum and a big open air folk museum named Skansen. The Nordic Museum is beautiful, but the exhibits are kind of blah. The Vasa Museum, which features an entire sunken ship from the 17th century that was lifted out of the water and restored, is the coolest thing I have seen so far on this trip. Boyfriend and I spent hours in the museum poring over everything, and just marveling at the size and the beauty of the ship.
We then walked around the park grounds – the entire island consists of a large botanical garden and lovely views of the center city and lots of nice picnicking spots. We ended up eating our food at one of these spots, then strolled along the canals looking at the boats gliding by, the
We are now sitting at one of the cafes in the city that has free Internet access. This evening, we plan to take a cable car lift to the top of a cliff to see Stockholm from a high point.
High point: hands down, the Vasa Museum.
Low point: Learning that I hate, hate, hate herring. Ugh.
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