Choices, Choices.

Last night was the Journal Fair at the law school. The twelve journals of the law school set up booths in the room named after a very prominent law firm in the area.

(I was amused when I found out about the name of this room -- they certainly know the best way to raise their profile... Come to think of it, I am surprised that no other firm has thought of this.)

The Fair was extremely well attended. I had to hang around for nearly 15 minutes before I could sign up for the Human Rights Journal. Am I really interested in human rights issues? Not sure. Also, journals that deal with technology law, international law, and civil rights law sound quite interesting as well. For all of them, I followed a policy of "sign up now, ask questions later".

The dean came and spoke at the Journal Fair. Her theme was "you don't have to do this. You should only do things you feel like doing at the law school. Don't let peer pressure and myths about what law firms want dictate what you do with your time. If you realize that you are not interested, feel free to leave now."

Everyone stayed where they were.

Tonight was the "practice organization fair", where clinical programs and student practice organizations present on a panel about their work and encourage people to sign up. There are organizations that deal with prisoner issues. There are organizatiosn that represent the accused at preliminary hearings. There are tenant advocacy organizations. There are organizations that research and present panels on human rights issues.

I am going to sign up for a few of them as well, though on the whole, as strange as it sounds, the people who presented at the panel for these organizations don't seem as interesting as the people who work on journals. Clearly they are passionate about their cause, but... what is it? I can't quite put my finger on it. I came away feeling slightly depressed.

Perhaps it's a feeling that unlike me, who am yet to make up my mind about a lot of issues about the criminal justice system (or the legal system in general), these people have definitely made up their minds and know which side of the fence they stand on.

They have very definite views. They believe that the criminal justice system is unfair, the prisons don't treat prisoners fairly, that DAs and the government are corrupt, that people don't get fair representation. No doubt, much of these criticisms are true. But I feel a little claustrophobic when I hang out with people with such settled world view.

When I was an undergrad, I felt very depressed and upset about my skeptical outlook. But I am realizing increasingly that it is what makes me feel safe and open to the world. As long as I don't settle into any single ideologies or opinions, the world is filled with possibilities. As soon as I have to choose, the world seems to narrow.

Well, I suppose I have to choose sometime. And perhaps I will give one of these practice organizations a try.